Unexpected Happenstance
by DaisyGrayBlue
Summary: Juice Ortiz lives a life filled with danger and adrenaline. An unexpected  encounter with the lovely, young and mysterious Ashley rattles his world and he discovers things he never thought possible. Things he never knew he wanted.
1. Chapter 1  Morning

**AN: Alright, this is my first fic, so be nice;) This story just suddenly came to me one day when I was drooling over the hotness that is Juice Ortiz (OKAY, I do like Jax as well :P), so I just decided to write something down. And it kind of escaladed from there I guess. The story is not set at any specific place in time during the series but just kind of generally during the first season (since Half Sack is still there;) ) Anyway, sorry for the long author's note!**

**Chapter I**

_Juice POV_

I was sweaty. And kind of sticky. And way too warm. My eyes opened cautiously, slowly adjusting to the sunlight blaring from the window. My head was pounding and I was feeling kind of queasy. I gradually began to recognize where I was. And who was with me. A half-naked body was pressed against me. At least it was female, because honestly, I couldn't remember how any of us got here. "Here" being the pool table located in the middle of Samcro's bar. I tried to separate our intertwined bodies, which only ended up in a slick sticky sound.

I slowly made my way upstairs to my apartment on top of the bar/bike shop. After a quick shower (where I used up almost all of my body wash) I fell into my unmade bed and hoped that sleep would erase whatever was left of last night.

_Ashley POV_

Mornings were always kind of nice. As if everything that had happened the day before was erased and you got to start again – A clean slate, which was kind of what I needed. This may or may not be the reason I moved out of my parents' house in Wilmington, North Carolina all the way across the country to Charming, California.

I could say that it was because I got accepted at Charming University, I really could. But that was a tremendous lie. A shitty little university in the middle of nowhere, CA wasn't exactly what I would call the education of my dreams. But it was as far away from my old life as I could get.

Living on my own was not as horrible and lonely as I thought it was going to be. I settled quickly into my own daily routine. My days were either spent at school or in the library. My nights were spent at home. Alone.

It wasn't like I hadn't befriended anyone; I just liked to keep to myself. In school I was one of the youngest students. Most of the others had worked after high school, or taken a few years off. I was 19. This was also a factor as to why I hadn't really connected to anyone in my class. Most of them had kids or families.

Now, where was I? Mornings, right. Yeah, they were great, totally my time of the day. Peaceful and quiet. I sat in my kitchen and sipped my tea as I flipped through the morning paper. There was mostly news about the local area, bake sales, community fund raisers, that kind of stuff. When I turned to the next page I was greeted with the thick black headline that read: _**Man found repeatedly stabbed near Oakland – Police fears gang wars. **_I didn't even read the rest, but quickly turned the page. I had had enough of that.

Instead I found the employment section. As I only went to CU for three days a week, I figured a job would be a good idea. The money I had wouldn't cover me for much longer. As I scanned the page offering jobs, I found a couple that seemed interesting. I had always been kind of good with kids. I'd volunteered at a children's hospital in Wilmington, and the children there seemed to like me. I liked working with kids. They were so oblivious to all the horrible things that went on around them. Or perhaps they weren't really oblivious; they just saw things from a different perspective. Which was really refreshing when all you are used to is the depressing and cynical world of adults.

So when I found a couple of babysitting ads I quickly jotted down the phone numbers and names. I looked at the clock above my refrigerator and noticed I really had to get a move on if I was going to make it to school on time.

_Juice POV_

The next time I woke up I felt I little bit better. The pounding in my head was reduced to a minor headache. I climbed out of bed slowly and started putting on my clothes. I then dragged myself downstairs to see how much damage had been done.

When I stepped into the bar I quickly looked over at the pool table. The female was gone. Thank God. I turned around toward the bar to see Half Sack tiredly cleaning its surface from alcohol, vomit and other fluids.

"What's up man?" He asked. "How's your head? You were kinda pouring down the drinks yesterday".

"Naw, I'm good man", I shrugged. "You know me".

Yes, if you knew me that was just another thing I would do. Drink myself stupid and attract a walking venereal disease. Half Sack only shrugged back at me and smiled, he knew me all too well.

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><p><strong>AN: <strong>

**Thanks so much for reading! I'm sorry if this was short, I'll be writing longer chapters soon and I hope to upload as often as possible, I have the next two chapters outlined and almost finished, so they will be up soon. After that I hope to update at least once a week, since school starts up soon.**

**Please feel free to review! I'd love any kind of feedback! And I'm sorry if the English is a bit off, I'm not a native speaker, so in case there's anything that sounds a bit strange, please tell me:) Oh, and I'm Swedish by the way, so if there is someone from Sweden reading this feel free to write to me in Swedish;)**

**Thanks! /N.**


	2. Chapter 2  Meeting

**So here comes chapter 2! Hope you like it!**

**Chapter II**

_Ashley POV_

University was mainly about lectures. Most of my time at school consisted of lectures. And lectures, although interesting, gave you time to ponder. Mostly about things completely non-related to the subject or theme of the lecture.

So this was how I found myself in the back of the lecture hall thinking about things I really shouldn't think about. I thought about my hometown and the people in it. I thought about that little corner café that I frequently visited with my father. Or whatever I should call him. I thought about the book store where me and my mother used to pick out silly books and quote the best passages to each other. My mother and I never did that anymore.

I was awoken from my daydream by people collecting their papers and bags as the lecturer rounded up the subject. I had no idea what had been said. Shit. Looked like I would be spending the night reading up on whatever it was.

I slowly made my way toward the door, shying away from people and trying to stay clear of the rowdy students; exhilarated that class was dismissed for today.

Finally out of the stuffy University building I breathed deep and felt the sun warming my face. This was something I really loved about California. The sun was always present. Even on cloudy days it somehow managed to protrude through the clouds and make its presence known.

I smiled faintly at the sky and made my way toward the local supermarket. Today was Taco-Tuesday and I needed supplies.

_Juice POV_

I was on one of the laptops in the clubhouse checking up on stuff for Clay. We didn't know if it was anything to worry about yet, but as my momma always said: "Better safe than sorry". At least she might have said something like that, if I'd stuck around long enough.

I was jolted back to reality from my little trip down memory lane by a dark raspy voice I could recognize anywhere.

"Juice, Gemma needs some stuff from the supermarket, you okay to tear yourself away from the porn for a while?" Clay's throaty chuckle resonated through the room.

"Really? Can't Half Sack do that?" I thought I was past these menial tasks since I was patched, but apparently Clay didn't see it that way.

"Yes. Really." His look told me he wasn't kidding.

I took the piece of paper that he was holding in his extended hand and glanced at it. Awesome, I was reduced to shopping for groceries. Nice.

_Ashley POV_

As I wandered the aisles of the supermarket looking for the right ingredients I heard a deep sigh. Not just one of those puffs of air, but a real deep dark sigh of despair. I knew that kind of sigh, all too well. I peeked around the corner of the shelf and was kind of surprised by what I saw. Over by the vegetables stood a tall man. But it wasn't his height that made me catch my breath. It was the rest of him. He was all clad in black. Black jeans that fit snuggly around his thighs and a faded black t-shirt. A leather vest was draped across his upper body and the words _Sons of Anarchy_ graced his shoulders. His head was almost completely shaved, save the low Mohawk that ran down his head. He had tattoos, although he wasn't completely covered in them. There were two on his head in the shape of lightning bolts and he had a couple more on his arms. And damn, those arms were toned. His golden skin suggested that he was of Mexican descent, or Puerto Rican maybe. In any case, he looked like nothing I had ever encountered.

He was standing by the onions and looking quizzically at the labels. He looked seriously confused so I did the only thing I could do. I approached him.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't help but notice, you look a little bit lost?" I phrased it as a question, hoping that he wouldn't be offended. "Can I help you with anything?"

He turned to me and for a moment I was a little lost in his eyes. They were big, dark and endless. He didn't say anything either, only stared at me for a moment.

"Help?" His voice sounded hoarse. "Right! Yes, actually, I am supposed to buy these onions right?" He pointed to the list in his hand. "But see, there are like hundreds of different onions here, and I have no idea which ones I should be getting, and it's kind of important that I get the right ones and-".

"Wait!" I held up my hand, needing to stop him, as I realized he was about to spontaneously combust if I didn't do something. "What does it say on the list?" I ventured slowly, to try to calm him down a little.

"It just says five onions." He said with a shrug.

"Right well, if there's no more specification I'd go with the regular onions" I said as I pointed to the right ones. "They're good for pretty much anything, so I'd say that's your safest bet", I smiled a little to make him feel less bad about the freak out.

"Oh, okay. Thanks" He smiled sheepishly.

"No problem, have a nice day, sir!" I gave him a final smile and nod and headed for the registers.

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><p><strong>And next up is Juice's take on the first encounter! Because lets face it, that's what we really want to read about.. :P<strong>

**/N.**


	3. Chapter 3  Ladies' Underwear

**AN: here comes chapter 3! Enjoy and feel free to review! :)**

**Chapter III**

_Juice POV_

Shit! All the note said was _5 Onions_. Well, thanks so much for fucking nothing! And who needed one hundred and thirty five different kinds of onions anyway? I was fucked, and royally so. I didn't want to piss off Gemma more than necessary by bringing back the wrong kind of onions. Shit, I sounded like a girl. I sighed for the hundredth time in five minutes as I studied the labels for some kind of clue. Not that I knew what I was looking for.

I heard someone clear their throat behind me.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't help but notice, you look a little bit lost, can I help you with anything?"

The voice was soft and quiet, and I just had to turn around to see who it was that would talk like that to someone like me. Because that was not what I was used to. People usually spoke to me in a loud voice, as if I was stupid or something. Which I wasn't. Not really. And the women that talked to me were always using a hoarse whisper that was supposed to sound sexy. And I figured, sure, whatever floated their boat, I wasn't too interested in their voices anyway, to be honest. But this soft sound was intriguing. As I turned around I was faced by something I found hard to describe. It was a woman, or more likely a girl. Her hair was wild and deep brown and curled around her head in some sort of messy up-do thing (don't ask me, I'm a dude and I don't have the vocabulary to describe it, it was nice is what I'm trying to say). Her eyes were big puddles of gray and her skin was white as porcelain. She was petite; almost didn't reach my shoulder and her baggy clothes made her look even smaller. Her eyes bored into mine and I had to remember where I was. She had asked me something, right…

"Help?" I croaked. "Right! Yes, actually, I am supposed to buy these onions right?" I knew I was about to babble but there was no way I could stop myself. I was stressed and kind of nervous around this girl and it all just escaladed to the point where I wasn't sure about what I was saying anymore. The girl just looked at me funny as I continued on with my jabbering. "But see, there are like hundreds of different onions here, and I have no idea which ones I should be getting, and it's kind of important that I get the right ones and-".

"Wait!" She held up her tiny hand in front of me and stopped me. She kind of had pretty hands. "What does it say on the list?" She asked slowly as if not to spook me. Again, people didn't usually speak like that to me.

"It just says five onions." I glanced at the list and shrugged.

"Right well, if there's no more specification I'd go with the regular onions", she pointed to the yellowy ones. "They're good for pretty much anything, so I'd say that's your safest bet", she smiled a tiny smile that made her look extraordinary. Shit, I really was becoming a girl.

"Oh, okay. Thanks", I smiled at her, trying in vain to come up with something to say to make her stay an instant longer.

"No problem, have a nice day, sir!" She gave me another smile and a nod as she turned around and headed away from me. I smiled sadly at the retreating back of this curious girl. She was something else. Shit, I might as well start wearing ladies' underwear, because my vagina was seriously starting to show.

_Ashley POV_

When I got home my head was filled with thoughts about the man in the supermarket. I just found him fascinating, as he wasn't like anything I'd ever laid eyes on. Everything, from his clothes and tattoos to his demeanor and piercing dark eyes, was so different and so utterly refreshing. My thoughts about the man were soon pushed to the back of my mind though, as I realized I should be calling up on the babysitting ads.

After about three _sorry, we've already filled the position_'s, I was about to give up hope. I was not really expecting anything when I dialed the last number.

"Teller-Morrow Mechanics, who am I speaking to?" A stern female voice answered.

"May I please speak to Gemma?" I asked tentatively, as that was the name from the ad.

"This is her." The woman's tone was clipped, as if she would not take any bullshit small talk.

"Oh, okay, my name is Ashley Armstrong, I'm calling about the ad?" I didn't know why I was suddenly so insecure, but this woman was kind of intimidating.

"Oh, yeah, that's right. Have you had any previous experience?" This woman was all business.

"Well, I've worked a lot with kids, babysitting and the likes of it. I also used to volunteer at the children's hospital in my hometown, so I know basic pediatric CPR as well as regular CPR." I wasn't one to brag, but in these situations you were kind of supposed to show off a little.

"Oh", the woman sounded a little bit surprised. "Right, well, I would actually need some help tomorrow afternoon. What times are you able to work?"

"Well, I go to CU, but I only have classes on Mondays, Wednesdays and Thursdays. And the classes are all in the mornings, so any time after that would work for me."

"Well, that is actually kind of life saving" I hoped she was joking. "Shall we say tomorrow at 3?"

I quickly jotted down the address and we said our goodbyes. After that I sat down in my empty kitchen and just smiled. And then I remembered the traditional Tuesday meal and started preparing the tacos.


	4. Chapter 4  Daydreams

**AN: OH MY GOD! I literally went completely apeshit when i realized that people are actually reading this! Yes, i seriously jumped around the apartment for like twenty minutes! :) THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READIN/REVIEWING/FOLLOWING! You are AMAZING! Okay, I'm going to stop with the ALLCAPS.. ;) In any case, I was kind of inspired, and decided to finish the next chapter (even though it's like 2 am where I live:P). I'm sorry if this chapter is kind of boring, but I promise that it leads up to more interesting stuff. Enjoy!**

**Chapter IV - Daydreams**

_Ashley POV_

Today's lecture was nothing out of the ordinary. I tried not to space out too much during the three hours, and I almost succeeded. It didn't help that I had other things on my mind. Other things like tall tattooed men with mohawks. Or more specifically just the one. It all resulted in me doodling lightning bolts in the margins of my note pad until people started collecting their stuff around me.

I looked at my wrist watch as I crossed the parking lot in front of the school. It was only about one pm, so I had a few hours to kill before I had to leave for my new job. I decided that rather than sitting in my empty apartment drinking coffee I should do something different. Like sitting in a café drinking coffee. Okay, so kill me for my lack of imagination, but it seemed like the best option.

So there I found myself at one of the local diners sipping some coffee and reading up on some school work. But my thoughts quickly started to drift, as seemed to be the case too often these days. As I glanced through the window I pictured, for like the zillionth time, the café I so often visited with my father. We would always go there for any occasion. My first lost tooth, me getting my driver's license, just getting away from my mom for a while. It was our haven, where we could talk about anything. Okay, I wouldn't talk to my dad about _everything_; some things were kind of _mom territory_, but more often than not I found that I could share things more easily with my dad than I ever could with my mother. But that was before. Before the shit storm brought on by no one other than mommy dearest.

I was jerked back into reality by the waitress coming by, asking if I wanted a refill. After a quick glance at the clock I politely declined and threw some money on the table as I rushed out of the diner. Old memories were making me late for new adventures.

_Juice POV_

I wanted to touch her. I wanted to know if all of her skin was as white and flawless as the little peek I had gotten yesterday. I wanted to run my fingers over each and every part of her and see which spot made her squirm. I was in deep shit. But these desires weren't what was scaring me though. It was the other impulses. Like the urgent need to look into her eyes, to know little odd facts about her, to hear her voice. And not even in a sexual way. I just wanted to hear her voice talk to me like she had yesterday. Yes, real pussy ass shit like that, that was what was scaring the living piss out of me.

I couldn't even concentrate on work. Which was a new experience. I had always been good with computers, like, really good. I could probably work for some company, or some shit, do the legal side of stuff. But that would never be enough for me. I lived for Samcro and the MC. Which was why there was no point in even dreaming of a steady relationship. Shit. Did I just say relationship? Steady relationship? As I said before: I was fucked.

I gave up trying to work and went outside to tinker a little with the bike. That usually did the trick when I wanted to clear my head.

_Ashley POV_

I pulled up into the driveway of a yellow one story house. On the outside it seemed like every other house on this street. Hopefully the inside would match. I jumped out of the car and made my way to the porch. Before ringing the bell I straightened my clothes and took a deep breath.

The woman answering the door was like nothing I would have ever expected. She looked too old to be the mother of the baby cradled in the crook of her arm, but she definitely didn't look like a grandma. Her long legs were clad in skintight bootlegged blue jeans. High heels that I wouldn't wear in a million years graced her feet. Her white wife beater exposed a scar right down the middle of her chest, suggesting some kind of open heart surgery. A couple of tattoos peeked out from beneath her flannel shirt. But what took me aback the most was her face. That was the face of someone who had seen a lot.

While I was doing my analyze, Gemma (because I assumed this was the woman I had spoken to over the phone) gave me a once-over of her own. I unconsciously straightened myself and tried in vain to look taller than I was. I decided to make the first move.

"Hi, I'm Ashley, you must be Gemma?" I smiled.

"Yes, I am, please, come in" She walked back into the house and I followed.

The inside of the house was homey. Yellow walls were accented with pictures of what I could only assume was family.

"And this little guy here is Abel." She cooed showing me the baby in her arms. I could see that even though the woman had a tough exterior, she cared for this child as much as any mother (or grandmother for that matter) could care for her child. I knew it was going to be hard for her to leave him alone with a total stranger.

"Oh, he's beautiful," I said as I played with his little hand. The best thing about babysitting such young babies, was that the job didn't usually entail that much hard work. Just being there and checking on him was really enough. Now four year olds was another story, entirely.

"Right, as you can see this is the living room, down the hall to the right is the nursery, the phone is right here by the kitchen area", as said, this woman was all business. "Our numbers are on the refrigerator."

"Okay, I think I've got it. Is there anything else I should know? Any special milk he likes or…?"

"I've filled a few of his bottles. They're in the refrigerator. Just heat 'em up if he gets fussy." She smiled down the baby and the expression on her face was one of utter bliss. I kind of felt like I was intruding.

"Well, I should be going, my work is never done," she joked and handed Abel carefully to me. "Call me if there is _anything _he needs, okay?" She looked sternly into my eyes and waited for me to answer before she did anything else.

"Of course," I smiled.

Just then the door opened and I young man came barging in. He looked to be in his mid-twenties. His hair was kind of long for a guy, but everything else about him screamed male. Broad shoulders were covered with leather and a knife was attached to his faded baggy jeans.

"Oh, and this is my son Jackson," Gemma motioned to the man standing in the middle of the yellow living room, looking kind of out of place in the cozy warm environment. "Jax, this is Ashley, our new babysitter".

The guy, Jax, gave me the same once-over that his mother had given me but seemed to approve and gave me a quick nod and a mumbled hello.

I learned that Jax was the father of Able, and that Gemma was, in fact the grandmother I had predicted her to be. As they were both leaving I caught a glimpse of what was written on the back of Jax's leather jacket. The white lettering and the fierce looking reaper in the middle were exactly the same. Exactly the same as those on the cut that _he_ wore. He who had been starring in my day dreams since yesterday.

**AN: Thanks again for reading! Feel free to review, it really makes my day:) And oh, I'm thinking of letting the two meet in the next chapter... ;)**

**/Nat 3**


	5. Chapter 5  Homecoming

**AN: Hi Juicelovers! So, I'm sorry if this took a little while, but I actually had to do a bit of research for this chapter, by which I mean sitting and watching season two with a notepad in my hand. Oh, and btw, I realized that this actually has to be set during season two (because Abel is home), so it will kind of loosly follow that season.**

**This chapter is aslo SUPERLONG (at least compared to previous chapters). Mostly because i promised that they'd meet again in this chapter, and while i was writing i realized that it would take a while. I thought about dividing it up into two parts, but i got lazy and just decided to put everything up at once:)**

**Oh, and for those of you who wonder why Gemma hired Ashley so quickly and without any fuss, to be honest i figured it would be easier that way. I wanted to focus more on their relationship and it just felt like too much hassle. Have i told you that I'm incredibly lazy? :P I hope it doesn't make you not want to read the story. :)**

**Oh and I've put a little shout out to _barefootandcrazy_, who has reviewed a couple of times, in the chapter, so if you can find it you get a theoretical cookie! :)**

**Okay, I'll let you read the chapter now:)**

**Chapter V - Homecoming**

_Juice POV_

Stuff seemed to be looking up for Samcro. Opie would be back soon and Bobby was getting home too. We'd made a deal with the Irish to run their guns for a while, as we were still under close watch by the ATF, but needed the business.

I was inside on one of the laptops when I heard the Prospect shout that Opie was back. Finally. What happened to him and his family was just awful. Nothing other than a sickening tragedy. So it felt good to have him back, as well as Bobby. It felt like the Sons were starting to get themselves back together, slowly but surely.

When I walked out I saw him. He was kind of thin and looked a little worn and battered but that haunted look in his eyes had diminished somewhat. We welcomed him home and went to have a sit-down in the Chapel to further discuss how to retaliate. Clay told us all he knew about that gangster SUV and about who had been driving it. At first we had thought it was the Niners, but after a talk with Leroy we agreed that it had to be the Mayans. The fingerprints on the dashboard of the SUV turned out to belong to one of Alvarez's boys. Clay decided that Chibs, Tig and Jax should back Opie up on his mission. With that settled we went out to the bar while Jax and Clay got into a heated discussion of their own.

After downing a few beers it was time for the retaliation squad to head out. We who were left got the prestigious job of cleaning the place up for tonight and Bobby's homecoming. As I was cleaning one of the tables I let my mind drift and what occupied my brain this time was deep gray eyes framed by thick lashes. Full lips and rosy cheeks.

"Man, if you keep polishing that spot you're gonna make a hole in the table", Piney's raspy voice woke me up from my fantasy.

I looked down. Damn, I think I could actually see my reflection in the surface of the wooden table.

"I was just uh, trying to wipe away a stain…" I muttered.

"Yeah, okay, sure." Piney laughed his sarcastic laugh and turned his back on me and walked away.

Shit. This girl was seriously messing with my mind. I wasn't even sure I was remembering her face or just coming up with something to keep my fantasies going. She probably wasn't even that beautiful. It was probably just my own brain fucking with me. I knew what I needed to do. I needed to get laid. And judging by the crater in the table in front of me, that needed to happen pronto.

_Ashley POV_

The week following that first afternoon of babysitting went well. School was pretty much the same. I managed to befriend some people in class, ace my first big exam and get started on my first course essay. I was also feeling more at home in the apartment. A quick trip to a few of the local stores got me new bed sheets, a fluffy rug and some lamps. It was kind of weird that there wasn't a single mall in this town, but also sort of nice, in an old-fashioned kind of way. In any case, my apartment was starting to feel more and more like a home. I had missed that.

Work was going great as well. Abel was really a saint and taking care of him was pretty much one of the easiest jobs I'd ever had. I also felt a bit more comfortable with Gemma after a while. She was one tough cookie, yet somehow, I felt we understood each other pretty well. She was starting to trust me around her grandson and we were forming a comfortable bond. She was by far one of the best bosses I'd ever had to deal with. A cruel and painfully honest boss, yet fair and sensible.

It was Thursday night and the clock was nearing seven. Gemma or Jax usually came home by this time to relieve me, but I hadn't heard neither the roar of a bike nor a car engine. I was sitting in Abel's nursery, reading up on stuff for school. A quiet cry came from within the crib next to me. I closed my book and got to my feet. I placed the book by the rocking chair and made my way over to Abel's crib.

When I picked him up I checked his diaper. Nope, that wasn't what he was fussing about. And he couldn't be hungry, since he had just had a whole bottle a half hour ago. He probably just needed a bit of comfort I supposed. I sat back in the rocking chair and rocked him a little, trying to sooth his quiet cries.

"Shh baby," I whispered. "Grandma is going to be home soon, and we don't want her to see us crying now do we?" I certainly didn't.

Abel quieted when I mentioned his grandma and just looked up with eyes that didn't belong on a little newborn. He actually looked into my eyes. He was an extraordinary little boy and I realized I was getting a little too attached to this child.

I was startled by the sound of a car outside. But I knew it wasn't Gemma's. I carefully laid the now sleeping Abel down in the crib and went to see who it was. I heard a key being turned and in stepped none other than Doctor Knowles. I had met the doctor a few times before. I'm not going to lie, I thought her relationship with Jax was a little odd. They seemed to be total opposites. She, a well-respected young doctor, he, one of the heads of a motorcycle club. It didn't make sense in theory. But when you saw them together you kind of understood. There were just these looks that they shared.

Doctor Knowles also reminded me a little bit of Gemma. She was far more friendly and nicer than her, but there was this kind of tough inside that they both shared.

"Oh, hi Ashley," Tara said as she hung her coat on the hanger. "I thought Gemma would be here".

"Yeah, me too, oh well, as long as you're here", I smiled.

"How's Abel?"

"Good, he just fell asleep", I started for my book bag and then turned toward the coat hanger.

"Oh, right, how do you do this? With the money I mean?" Doctor Knowles asked. I couldn't help but notice that she sounded a bit tired.

"Oh, no yeah, Gemma just pays me at the end of each week, it's easier that way." I pulled on my jacket and pulled my book bag over one shoulder. "Well, good night then".

"Yeah, good night", Doctor Knowles smiled.

_Juice POV_

We were all riled up as Bobby was coming home in a matter of minutes. The clubhouse was swimming with Sons as well as a whole damn lot of women. They were all over the place, grinding on strip poles, furniture and men. Yes, tonight I'd make sure that I'd get rid of the fantasies of the Onion Knowing Goddess.

We all made our way outside as we heard a car pull into parking lot of the shop. But when we got out we soon realized that it wasn't Bobby. What we were met by was someone else. A middle-aged man in a gray suit exited the car. He was soon surrounded by a posse of men. Their heads were shaved and their faces hard. The man in the middle was obviously some sort of leader. He walked slowly up to Clay and we quickly arranged ourselves around him. The sleazy suit told us some shit about opening a cigar shop in Charming. He even offered Clay a box of cigars. Clay didn't even look at it.

"We feel it would be best for all concerned if you stopped dealing arms to the One Niners and the Mayans", the suit said without as much as a blink. We laughed at this. Clay cleared his throat.

"I don't even know what you're talking about. We're just mechanics and Harley lovers."

"You are done selling guns to color." The man continued.

It was then that Tig noticed the company that the suit was keeping. It was one of Darby's guys. He put his hand on his gun. Clay gave him a look that clearly said: _not here, _and continued.

"Nobody threatens Samcro. And nobody tells us what we can and can't do. Black, brown… or white", he looked at the man closest to the suit who looked like his eyeballs were going to pop out of their sockets. "The next time you piss all over my shoes it _will _kill you and I don't give a shit how many witnesses there are." Clay's voice suggested that that was final.

"My shop opens in a few weeks. Until then… enjoy", the suit left the pack of cigars as well as a business card before he got in his car and drove away. This guy seriously had a death wish.

Clay handed me the business card. "I wanna know everything", was all he said.

"You got it", I was really fucking eager to find some shit on this guy.

The party soon recovered and when Bobby did finally arrive he was greeted with roars and shouts. I brought him his cut and put it on him, where it belonged.

The rest of the party was wild. Everywhere I looked there were grinding women, beer flowing like freaking waterfalls and people in various stages of intercourse. Bobby, the guest of honor himself, had dived headfirst between the legs of a seasoned redhead.

As I sat by the bar with Chibs and some of the other guys I looked around the clubhouse. My plan to get laid was still in full affect and the only thing remaining, was to find the lucky girl. I suddenly felt two hands on my shoulders and a breathy voice that whispered in my ear:

"I'll let you buy me a drink if you can guess the color of my underwear".

I turned around and was greeted by quite a sight. First of all, her thong was on display for everyone to see, so that was just a cheesy pickup line. The woman must've been in her late twenties, early thirties. Her hair was long and blond (I think it was fake, but then again, as previously stated, I'm a dude, so what do I know?) and kind of greasy in the front. She had big lips that were all covered in that pink gooey stuff that looks a little bit like glue. Her lids were heavy with makeup and her eyes very firmly plastered on my crotch. She had a decent figure and her short dress showed off her legs pretty nicely. This was exactly what I had been looking for. She was really my type.

But I couldn't do it. Even though this woman was kind of perfect for my intentions, I couldn't say the words to seal the deal. I just sat there silent. Because her eyes were the wrong color. And her hair was not brown and wavy. And she had one of those orangey fake tans. And she wasn't what I really wanted. _Who _I really wanted.

I left her there with a dumbfounded look on her face and took my beer with me outside. I sat down next to Opie, who was sipping his alcohol quietly. We sat there for a while before he went home to his kids. After that I lingered a while until I got cold and then went inside to try and drink away the images in my mind of brown hair and gray eyes. I didn't succeed though, as the last thing I saw before I passed out that night was nothing other than that.

_Ashley POV_

I got a call early next morning from Jax, asking if I could come by and watch Abel for a while. As I didn't have any plans I said I'd be there in twenty minutes. I didn't really have time to ponder today's outfit, so I thought jeans and my oversized Elvis Costello shirt would do. A quick breakfast later I arrived at Jax's house.

I was kind of surprised that Gemma wasn't around to watch Abel, but I wasn't one to turn down extra work.

I was about to start going through my notes from my last lecture when I heard the door open. I looked up and saw Gemma.

"Good morning", I smiled at her. She didn't react. That's when I noticed it. Her entire face was covered in bruises. She had a cut on her cheek and her lip looked to be in pretty bad shape.

"Oh my god, what happened?" I asked. Gemma didn't answer me, she only went into the nursery and retrieved Abel.

"I need to get him to St. Thomas", she said in a toneless voice.

"I thought he had all his tests", I was almost sure that Gemma had mentioned it a couple of days ago.

"He needs more", her voice was still apathetic and she was not meeting my eyes. Something seemed off.

Doctor Knowles entered then just as Gemma exited the house with Abel in her arms. The doctor looked at me.

"I need to get them both to the hospital", she said as if trying to convey something.

"Maybe I should follow you", I wasn't sure, but my instincts told me that it wasn't so much about Abel getting to the hospital, as his grandmother doing so.

"That would be good", the doctor nodded and we headed out of the house.

_Juice POV_

I groaned as I woke up. My head was pounding and the taste in my mouth was like nothing I'd care do describe. I opened one eye to take in my surroundings. Apparently I had fallen asleep in one of the armchairs in the clubhouse. Well, anything was better than the pool table. I looked around the room and noticed that people were getting up. The blond girl with the thong from yesterday had fallen asleep with her face in Bobby's crotch, so I guess her night wasn't completely ruined by my apparent mental retardation. Oh well, I'd just have to find another way to scratch this itch I had.

Suddenly Chibs' phone rang (way too shrill for this time of the day).He groggily answered. He seemed to sober up though as he heard what the caller had to say.

"Hurry up lads! Don't lie there like a pile o' dog shite" He yelled. "Clay just called, Gemma's in the hospital, some kind of car accident".

That woke everybody up and soon we were on our way to St. Thomas, dragging a half-dead Bobby with us. When we arrived at the hospital we found a gurney on which we laid Bobby has he was not feeling like a million bucks. More like twenty five cents.

"How's the homecoming queen?" Tig smirked when he saw us rolling up to the visitors lounge.

"He's a little bit green", I laughed.

Bobby seemed to regain consciousness and lifted his eyes to Clay.

"How's Gemma?"

"Better than you", Clay joked, but real worry played behind his eyes.

Bobby murmured something and drifted off to sleep again. Tara, the doctor, came out then to tell us how Gemma was. But to be honest I didn't hear a single word she said. Because I was kind of occupied. Because next to Clay stood a woman. A girl. _The _girl. Her hair was in a messy thing on top of her head. She wore faded jeans and a large, black T-shirt. Nothing had ever looked sexier. I had _definitely _not exaggerated her beauty. I might have understated it though.

I didn't even notice that she was holding a baby until she met my eyes. Oh shit. It wasn't her baby was it? She was a little too young right? Or maybe she wasn't as young as I'd guessed? Maybe she was married and her husband would walk through the doors any minute now. Fuck, I would break that fucker's neck. What the fuck was wrong with my brain?

As she handed the baby over to Clay I realized that it was, in fact, Abel. Well crap, if I went apeshit over hypothetical issues about this girl, what would happen if I actually got involved with her. _Wait! What makes you think she would go for someone like you? _My inner voice was kind of killing me. I decided to do the only reasonable thing. No, I wasn't going to run away and hide (which seemed kind of appealing). I was going to talk to her. Maybe she would like my company. Oh fuck, who was I kidding? If I was lucky maybe I could impress her with biceps. Something told me she wasn't the kind of girl who would be impressed by that.

**If only he knew... :P**

**The next two chapters are _kind of _outlined, so I hope I'll be able to post them soon:)**

**Oh, and sorry that I over-use the phrase _kind of._ I really am sorry. Kind of... ;)**

**Thanks for reading! Feel free to review:)**

**/Nat**


	6. Chapter 6  Computers and whatnot

**Hi there! I'm a little swamped with schoolwork right now, so that's why this chapter took a while :/ Unfourtunately that also means the next chapter won't be up until late next week (absolutely no later than Thursday).**

**This chapter kind of wrote itself, and it wasn't really what I was originally planning, but I hope you like it:)**

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><p><strong>Chapter VI – Computers and Whatnot<strong>

_Ashley POV_

When Doctor Knowles had filled us in on Gemma's condition I felt the entire group breathe a collective sigh of relief. It was quite a sight. The waiting area of St. Thomas, all pastels and whites, was filled with big, tall men clad in black and leather. And they all had the same expression on their faces. Like little boys worrying about their mommy. It was an interesting dynamic to say the least.

But to be honest I wasn't really observing the group of men too much. I was way too busy focusing on one in particular. The one with the Mohawk and the dark eyes. As I handed Abel over to Mr. Morrow, I saw Mohawk guy making his way over to where I was standing. The look in his eyes was a little bit too intense for someone you had just met once before. But I couldn't say that I minded all that much.

"So, you stalking me Onion Girl?" He smiled as he sidled up to me.

"Yes, totally, you should see my shrine at home", I joked. "Completely devoted to Mohawk Man". I smiled sweetly at him. His smile grew wider.

"Really? Well then, I should probably tell you my name, I mean that's the least I could do".

"What? And lose all the mystery? What if I lose interest?" I didn't know if I was taking it a bit too far with the babbling (I had a tendency to do just that), but it looked like he was all for it.

"Nah, I'll take my chances." He smiled and looked at me. His dark eyes poured intensely into mine . "It's Juice. Juice Ortiz".

"Well nice to meet you Juice Juice Ortiz", I winked. "Perhaps I'll see you around", with a smile I turned my back on him and went to see if Mr. Morrow needed me, or if I should make my way home.

_Juice POV_

_What the fuck?_ I had no idea what had just transpired. I'd made it over to the girl that had starred in my wet dreams for a while. I'd even talked to her and made her smile. She seriously had one of the nicest smiles I'd ever seen, all full lips and dimples. Shit. _VAGINA-ALERT! _And just when I was introducing myself, giving her my best _I'm-totally-into-you-_look, she decides to up and disappear. I mean seriously! What the fuck? No woman had ever reacted that way to the look. I even did the _Bond. James Bond_ –introduction! And all she did was make fun of it and run away?

I had never had trouble winning women over. Maybe it was because the women I usually dealt with were nothing like this girl. She was the complete opposite of _my type_. She wasn't at all what I would usually go for. Apparently usual was not enough for me anymore. Apparently I craved the unusual, the extraordinary.

"Got the hots for Abel's nanny there ey?" Chibs was kind of crude and straight to the point. As usual.

"Nah, I mean she's interesting and all, but I don't even know her name." I shrugged, feigning indifference.

"Well, I would tell ya, but since you're not that interested…" Chibs let the rest of the sentence hang, challenging me.

I thought about it. If I told Chibs about my strange infatuation (Yes, I know the word, I'm not _that _stupid), I would make myself look ridiculous. I was never the guy to chase after women. They usually came to me. Then again, as previously stated, I wasn't really into the usual these days.

"Yeah fine, tell me, if it's so important…" I tried to sound vague and bored. I didn't fool anyone, least of all Chibs.

"Nah, I don't think you want it enough", he laughed and sashayed over to Clay and Abel. Yes, he fucking _sashayed_. Dickhead. Yet, I couldn't do anything other than follow him. And _maybe _beg. Just a little.

"C'mon man, just tell me", I said, keeping my voice down.

"You really wanna know?" Chibs raised his eyebrow in question.

"Yes!" I whisper-shouted. Which kind of made me sound like an asthmatic pig.

"Eh, Clay, so, who's the new babysitter?" Chibs asked. The fucker didn't even know himself? He had just made me look like an ass for no good reason! I was seriously going to fucking kill him, right there in the fucking waiting area at St. Thomas. I totally would, if I wasn't so eager to hear what Clay was about to say.

"Who, Ashley?" He grunted. "Guys, if I were you I wouldn't even go there. She's Abel's nanny, and besides, Gemma likes her." He looked pointedly at me. But I was already gone.

_Ashley. _It actually kind of seemed to fit her. I'd never had a thing about names before, but this was fucking beautiful. I suddenly had the urge to go carve it into a tree or something. Along with my own. _Are you fucking insane? _My brain shouted at me. _Do you think you're some kind of pansy ass-Romeo all of a sudden? _I went outside to my bike. I needed some time to think and process. And plan my next move. Because there was no reason denying it, not to myself. I was strangely drawn to this girl, and something, somewhere inside me wondered what it would be like to stop resisting and give in to the pull.

_Ashley POV_

The following few days were… strange. Gemma seemed kind of out of it. She didn't seem like herself for some reason, all quiet and pensive. Her notoriously sharp tongue was replaced by delayed, short answers. And I was still a little bit confused about the car accident. Why had she said that it was Abel who needed to get to the hospital? Why couldn't she just have gone by herself? It was as if she was hiding something. As if she didn't want anyone to know what had happened.

I pondered all this as I sat in one of the local parks, Abel's carrier next to me on the bench. The weather outside was perfect, sunny, but not too hot. It was nearing two in the afternoon and my stomach was kind of telling me to feed it. _Only five more minutes._ I reasoned with myself. I needed my vitamin D.

I lazily played with Abel's hand as I closed my eyes and tilted my head toward the warm glow of the sun. After a while I felt a shadow fall over my face.

"Hi there pretty lady", a voice said. A voice I would have recognized anywhere. I didn't open my eyes.

"No 'Onion Girl'? I'm disappointed", I smiled, keeping my eyes closed.

"Nope", he popped the P. "I figured since I know your real name the mystery of Onion Girl is revealed." I opened my eyes at this and beheld the man in front of me. _Oh shit._ His leather vest was draped over a t-shirt. A _tight _t-shirt. It showed off broad, defined arms. They looked smooth. I wanted to touch them. _Shit, I'm turning into a horny teenage boy, _I thought to myself. I shook my head to clear it. "Clay told me", he shrugged, misjudging my expression for confusion.

"Really? How can you be sure it's my real name? I mean, I could be a wanted fugitive, taking the name of my dead dog", I said, trying to be serious and not smile. I _almost _pulled it off. He flopped down on the bench beside me.

"Well yes you could, but then who in the hell would call their dog _Ashley_?" His eyebrows rose and he smiled a half-smile. It was kind of cute. And maybe a little adorable.

"Yeah, I guess you're right, that _would _be a terrible dog name." I smiled. I decided to change the subject before it got anymore twisted. "So what brings you into town? I don't think I heard your bike."

"Nope, took the car. Needed some stuff from the electronics store, fixing up a couple of old laptops at the garage", he shrugged.

"So you're into that kinda of stuff? Computers and whatnot?" I ventured. I really didn't know anything about that stuff, but somehow I wasn't ready to end the conversation yet. He looked at me and laughed.

"Heh, yeah, computers and whatnot… yeah, it's probably the _only _thing I'm good at", he smiled sadly.

"Well, that and picking out onions", I smiled at him.

"I thought we established that that was, in fact, _your _hidden talent", he joked.

"No, you did just fine, after a little coaching", I winked. Yes, I _freaking winked_. And if I didn't know any better I think I might be flirting with him. Just a little. "And besides, you should be glad that you understand those monsters they call computers. I have no idea what I'm doing half the time with mine. I'll probably end up buying a new one, since my brother borrowed it and it came back with like a million viruses." I was kind of ranting.

"Viruses? Well that's not too hard to get rid of you know".

"Yeah, it is if you're me. And to hand it in to some service to have it checked costs a fortune", I sighed.

"Yes, it does. Unless you know someone who'll do it for free", he looked at me intently. When I met his eyes I lost my train of though.

"Yeah, I guess…?"

"Someone like say, me?" He looked at me like I was stupid for not realizing what he was talking about right from the start.

"Oh? Oh! Would you do that?" I was a little bit shocked at this display of generosity of this utter stranger. But then again, he had never acted like we were complete strangers.

"Yeah, of course, no biggie".

"Oh, thank you, that would actually save me a lot of money". My stomach growled loudly and I realized lunch was long overdue. "Well, I should be going. Do you want my address? To come and fix the computer, I mean", I sounded a little nervous all of a sudden.

"Yeah, sure", he said. I jotted down the address on a piece of paper and handed it to him. As we rose from the bench he turned to me. "You going to Jax's?"

"Yeah".

"I'll give you a ride, it's on my way anyway", he said and escorted me to his car. His big and manly car. That smelled of cigarettes, gasoline and man. I inhaled deeply during the entire ride.

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><p><strong>Thanks for reading! Feel free to review!<strong>

**Hope you guys have an awesome weekend! I know I will! :) Tomottow (Saturday) is Valborg in Sweden, Walpurgis Night (Thank you Wikipedia) which means people light huge bonfires all over Sweden, so my weekend is set ;)**

**Love and stuff, Nat**


	7. Chap 7 Acquaintances with Possibilities

**AN: Yay! New chapter! The upcoming weekend is going to be quite busy for me, so I'd say that the next update will probably be on Monday. And I just realized, it could be on another day, depending on where you are located in the world. Well, Monday in Sweden;) And if you feel like it, metion where you're from in the reviews, I'm kind of interested! :) (I'm from Stockholm, Sweden)**

**Okay, I'll let you read the chapter now! And oh, btw, the song I pictured in my head that Ashley was putting on is _Piece of My Heart _by Janis Joplin. Enjoy!**

**Chapter VII - Acquaintances with Possibilities**

_Juice POV_

I was literally jumping out of my skin. Tomorrow was Tuesday. And not just any Tuesday. _The _Tuesday. Okay, maybe I was hyping it up a bit. But it was still a really big deal. Tuesday was the day I was coming over to Ashley's house to fix her computer. I had never really given stuff like that a second thought, the fixing of computers. It just always came so naturally to me and no one in the club questioned it or expected anything less. But fixing this girl's computer was different. I think it was this primal surge of manly pride – I was fixing my woman's problems. Okay, I admit it, I was going a little bit cave man there, but it felt nice. Oh and yeah, I had started to think of Ashley in terms of _my girl_. I didn't know how it started but it just kind of did. And I couldn't say I minded all that much.

To say I was nervous would be an understatement, to say the least. So that was how I found myself, Tuesday morning, in my room on top of Samcro's bar, wondering what I was going to wear. Yes, I had literally turned into a woman once and for all. I shook my head, trying to clear it. Somehow, I didn't think Ashley would be the girl to judge someone on what they were wearing. She seemed to be more of an insides-person, you know one of those _it's-the-inside-that-matters _types of people. But then again, maybe I didn't know here as well as I was imagining. And maybe she wasn't as interested as I thought. And maybe… I was going to be late! Shit!

_Ashley POV_

I walked around my apartment. I had cleaned it about three times. The kitchen area was spotless, the floors dust free. Even the freaking bathroom was cleaned. And so I paced. I'd never been one to dress up for any occasion (At senior prom I combined my prom dress with red chucks, just for kicks and giggles, oh, and comfort), so I didn't really feel like wearing anything special. I just wore my regular black leggings, paired off with a big Thin Lizzy-shirt and a gray hoodie.

We'd decided on noon, and the clock was nearing that time. Fifteen minutes. I paced. Ten minutes. I paced. I didn't even know why I was getting so over-excited about this. It wasn't like we were romantically involved. This wasn't a date. We were barely even friends. More like acquaintances. Acquaintances with possibilities.

Shit, he was probably not going to come at noon anyway. He was probably busy. Busy fending off the women coming into the shop looking for someone to.. erm… _air their tires_. Or something. Okay, this was becoming ridiculous, I needed to sit down. As soon as I hit the couch cushions there was a loud knock on my door.

I sprang to my feet and hustled over to the door, checking my hair in a mirror on the way. Well, there was nothing to do about that. I took a deep breath and opened the door.

"Hi", his shy smile kind of made up for the anti-climactic greeting. Oh, and the way his hands were pushed way down into the pockets of his jeans was more than adorable.

"Hey", I smiled, taking a step back to let him into the apartment. As he passed me I sniffed him a little. Yes, I'm not proud of it, but I'll admit it, I sniffed, and the scent was a little bit intoxicating. Like aftershave, cars and man. I was a goner. He looked at my sock-clad feet and bent down to untie his boots.

"So what've you been up to since our latest rendezvous?" He asked. I was surprised. Not that he knew the expression, but that he actually used it. He didn't seem like the type that would casually drop a few French phrases here and there.

"Not much, school and Abel is taking up most of my time, and getting settled here", I shrugged. Before I could return the question he continued.

"Really, what are you studying?"

"Literature".

"D'you like it?" I liked that he didn't just assume that I liked what I was studying. Most people had this strange assumption that whatever you studied was your greatest passion.

"Yeah, it's okay, I love to read and this is kind of perfect for that", I smiled.

"Yeah, I guess. So what are you gonna be when you grow up then?" He smirked.

"And what am I now? A child? I'd say I'm pretty grown up already", I joked.

"Meeh, I don't know, how old are you? Twenty? Twenty-one?"

"Uhm, actually I'm nineteen", I said quietly. I couldn't help but notice his eyes widen at this. Shit. He thought that I was just a kid. Shit shit shit.

"Well, then you're certainly not that grown up yet", he smiled. I figured that was the end of this particular conversation. I quickly steered things onto more neutral subjects.

"So, yeah the computer is in here", I motioned to the living room area, which was combined with the kitchen area.

He went after me and took a seat on my couch and started the computer up. I don't know why but he looked at home, here in my half-furnished apartment. Maybe it was the way his shoulders looked more relaxed without the leather cut, or maybe it was his feet without any shoes on. I couldn't really pin-point the exact thing, but something told me that this was where he belonged. And yes, I was in quite a deep puddle of swoon.

His fingers flew over the keyboard and his eyes were intensely focused on the screen. Anyone could see he knew exactly what he was doing. There wasn't a single moment or pause of uncertainty. It was a bit mesmerizing to watch. I figured he'd want a snack or something, and to be honest I was feeling a bit peckish myself. I went over to my LP-player and chose one record that I had been listening to all week. The intro sounded throughout the apartment. Juice looked up and smiled, recognizing the song.

I went over to the kitchen and opened my tiny refrigerator. Swaying to the music and humming slightly with the lyrics I picked out everything needed for a healthy BLT. The song had me in kind of a trance and as the guitar solo come up I cut the final sandwiches into halves and put two of them onto a plate which I placed beside Juice on the coffee-table. He looked up at me surprised.

"Figured you'd want something to eat", I smiled. "Anything to drink to that?"

"Whatever you have is fine, but no milk though". At my questioning look he added "Lactose intolerant", with a sheepish smile.

I put a glass of pink lemonade, ice cubes and everything (I went all out trying to impress the guy who only saw me as a kid), on the table beside the plate. I noted that one of the sandwiches was already gone.

The afternoon continued and we chatted amiably about all kind of stuff like school, work, movies, music and people. As the hours passed I realized something. I was really falling for this guy. And it wasn't really a crush anymore. Crushes usually cooled once you actually met and spent time with the person, but this feeling seemed to intensify as I got to know him more and more. To be honest, it was kind of scaring me. This was going way too fast for my liking and even though I knew I was treading unknown territory I couldn't seem to stop myself.

When the time neared nine we realized that it was getting pretty late. I had school the next day, and even though I hated to do it, I walked him to the door.

"Well, goodnight then princess", he smiled with one side of his mouth and made his way out of my apartment. And yes, I totally went to the window to see his bike roaring out onto the street and glowing a bit in the last rays of the setting sun.

_Juice POV_

She was nineteen. A fucking teenager! And the worst thing about it was that even though I knew how young she was, I still desperately wanted her. And the more time I spent in her presence, the more I wanted to stay there. I loved the way her hair looked like dark gold in the sun. I loved how she played LP's instead of MP3's. I loved her tinkling laughter as she told me anecdotes. I loved the way she talked to me; no one ever spoke to me like that, like an equal. People usually looked up to me or looked down on me, but this girl (this _teenage _girl) treated me as if I was the same as her.

And the thing was, even though I knew I really wasn't the same as her, I really wanted to be. She was good and pure and it made want to be that too, not just for her, but kind of for me too. I wanted to be a man deserving of her.

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><p><strong>Okay, so I know this wasn't the most exciting chapter ever, but I feel that Juice and Ashley are kind of in that <em>get-to-know-eachother-phase. <em>I promise I have some drama lined up for these two;)**

**And yes, I totally made him lactose intolerant. I mean, it's just too cute! ;)**

**Oh, and here is where I shamelessly pimp myself out:P I have twitter, and if you feel like it come and pay me a visit;) It's daisygrayblue. I about my life and boring stuff like that. Come say hi:)**

**Love,**

**Nat**


	8. Chapter 8  Confessions

**AN: SORRY! I know my update was due a few days ago, but I was so exhausted after the weekend, I just couldn't find it in myself to sit down and write. But to make it up to you guys, I'm posting a SUPERLONG chapter! I was originally going to divide it into two chapters but I figured this was better. So, this is where the story picks up a little. I'm sorry if the chapter is a bit incoherent, but I was really tired when I wrote it and I am way too lazy to proofread it:p Plus I figured I'd post it as soon as it was done;)**

**In any case, here I present: CHAPTER 8!**

**Chapter VIII – Confessions**

_Ashley POV_

The moon was gleaming dully as it hung above us in the dark night sky. The air was a bit dry and remnants of the day's heat were lingering. The porch creaked under the rocking chair I was sitting in. I'd brought it out of Abel's nursery just for the evening. I think he enjoyed the cool evening air as he cooed when a breeze came wafting by. I had still buried him in blankets, worrying for his health. He was strong, given what Gemma had told me about his start in life, but better to be safe than sorry.

As I played with his little hand I got lost in my own head (as was the case more and more often these days). I thought about Juice. About the way his eyes were always on mine when we were talking, as if I actually had something interesting to say. I'd never been one to pine over men. I'd had crushes, sure, but this time it felt way too intense. It wasn't just the _I can't stop thinking about you-_thing, but it was as if my mind had erased all other information, only to make room for more thoughts of this man. This intriguing man that never ceased to surprise me.

We'd met a few times since the computer-fix, but nothing had happened. I mean, I'm no expert, by any means, but if somebody _liked _you, he was supposed to show it, right? But then again, I guess he _did _show me he liked me. As a friend. A _younger _friend. Not that he made a big deal about it or anything, but it still somehow felt as though treated me as a little sister.

I, on the other hand, had to refrain myself from humping him like a dog in heat. I was so insanely attracted to this man, it was ridiculous. His toned arms, his shaved head, all that skin just waiting to be touched, explored. I felt these urges that were so foreign to me. I wasn't that experienced, but this man brought out these intense longings out of me, and I almost couldn't resist the pull.

But I was afraid I was imagining any attraction from his side, and perhaps it was time to stop thinking of him in these terms. Well now, that was the challenge now, wasn't it?

So, I tried. I tried to be a pal, a buddy. I joked around with him and he joked around with me. To an outsider we must've looked like siblings. Siblings that didn't look anything like each other. Maybe adopted siblings? Okay, this was going way out of line…

I sighed and looked up at the pale moon. Some things were just too difficult to ponder at a night as beautiful as this. Abel had fallen asleep in my lap and I tucked the blankets tighter around him. I was going to sit here for just a few more minutes. During which I would not think about the enigma that was Juice Ortiz. Yeah right…

_Juice POV_

The week following my visit at Ashley's apartment I did whatever I could to see her. I started hanging around Jax and Gemma more, inviting myself over to Jax's house a few times just to see her and be around her for a few minutes. We always chatted and joked and I always felt really at ease with her. That was until she did something like brush her hair behind her ear or stretch her arms wide and show me some of her smooth, pale skin. _Yup, not so at ease anymore._

I kept reminding myself that she wasn't as experienced as the women I usually met, which was why I couldn't do anything that would spook her, or make her see me as a pervert. So no, I couldn't be the one to brush her hair behind her ear, no matter how much I wanted to. And I _desperately _wanted to.

I tried not to let my fascination with this girl become to evident, but there was just some people I couldn't fool. So, that was how I found myself in the shop with Jax Teller himself, asking me about my intentions toward his baby sitter.

"So Juice, is there something going on between you and Ashley?" He looked away and then met my eyes.

"What do you mean?" I asked, even though I knew he could see through me in an instant.

"You know what I mean, d'you like her?"

"Uhm… I mean, yeah, she's uh… great! A real little firecracker isn't she?" I tried to play the vague card, to see where he was going with this.

"Yeah, that she is", he smiled. "My mom really likes her too, you know", he looked at me intently.

"Yeah?" I was getting a little nervous.

"Yep, that is why she asked me to ask you what you're planning to do about the two of you."

"Huh? The two of us?" I was actually a little befuddled. Did Gemma want to know my intentions with Ashley?

"You know, as in your intentions", Jax looked at me like I was stupid. And he also seemed kind of uneasy about being the one to bring this up.

"Oh! Eh… I don't know, I don't think I ah… have any _intentions _when it comes to your baby sitter Jax", I smiled apologetically, trying to seem taken aback.

"Oh? Okay, I mean, it's just that Gemma said that you two seemed to be kind of into each other and I was just making sure your intentions were honest. But if you don't even-"

"She said Ashley seemed _into _me?" I interrupted him. I was ecstatic! Ashley was into _me_?

"She just said that the room seemed to be filled with repressed sexual tension", he shrugged. At my raised eyebrow he added "Her words, not mine, I think it's some of that psychoanalytic stuff she's been reading". But I wasn't even listening. Was it that obvious? That I wanted her? And was the attraction not one-sided? Could I be this goddamn lucky?

"…so Gemma decided to invite her to the party on Saturday", Jax said as he started to walk away, toward the main office. I ran up beside him.

"What? Ashley's coming here? On Saturday?"

"No, she's coming her on Sunday to help clean up. _Of course _she's coming on Saturday!" He looked at me like I had, finally, lost my mind. He turned around and headed toward the office.

Ashley, _my Ashley_. Was coming here. On Saturday. And Gemma thought that Ashley and I were into each other – repressed sexual tension. Oh shit. Saturday was only two days away and I was already going crazy.

_Ashley POV_

So, what did one wear to a motorcycle club gathering?

When Gemma asked me to come to the party Samcro was throwing I was a bit surprised. First of all I wondered who was going to take care of Abel (turned out that Gemma had gotten one of her friends to take him for the night), but I was also a little thrown by the generosity of this offer. We weren't friends by any means, and even though I felt we got along great, I was still surprised.

During the last few weeks I had gotten to know a few of my classmates better. Especially two of them, Theo and Gabi. Theo was an _interesting _person. He was one of the brainier people in the class, which always made for good conversation. His humor was a bit dry, and he was an all-around fun guy to be around. Gabi, on the other hand, was a glam-diva (or so she called herself). She was the kind of girl that could wear anything, and it would still look good. She was always rocking some crazy new fashion trends, whether it was super-tight latex or snakeskin-bustiers. She was all fun and spending time with her was exhilarating, although sometimes a bit exhausting.

So that was how I found myself in my apartment at seven-thirty on Saturday night, trying to choose what to wear. On my bed (next to huge pile of clothes) sat Gabi, wrinkling her nose at my latest outfit.

"It's way too baggy", she whined, pulling at my oversized black dress. "And you need to show more skin".

"I thought this was enough", I said quietly pulling at the dress, indicating my naked shoulder.

"No, it looks like you're going to church. But luckily for you, I brought some stuff", she lurched at her bag and pulled out something. I breathed a sigh of relief when I noticed that it was black. The sigh didn't go unnoticed.

"Oh, cut that out, I know you don't like my style", she said, trying to sound hurt.

"No, it's just that you and I have so different styles…" I tried to amend.

"Yep, I'm fabulous and you dress like a hobo", she smiled sweetly at me. I sighed and grabbed the item of clothing from her hands. I pulled it on, but not without difficulty. It was tight. Way tighter than anything I'd ever worn.

"It's perfect!" Gabi cooed. "You look absolutely _marvelous_!"

"Are you sure?" I asked pulling the bottom of the black tube dress down a bit. Which only made my boobs fall out at the top.

"YES! The guys will be drowning in their own saliva!" Gabi gushed. "And I have the perfect shoes to go with that!"

Thirty minutes later I was all made up, in the perfect dress, the perfect shoes and desperately clutching the perfect bag.

A car horn sounded outside my apartment building and when I peeked through the blinds I recognized Doctor Knowles's car. After several hugs and kisses I waved goodbye to Gabi, thanking her over and over for her help, and made my way over to the car.

The ride over to the club house was amiable. We chatted and the doctor assured me that it wasn't going to be as horrible and awkward as I was expecting. According to her the Sons were all really nice guys. Oh, I knew one of them was. Oh and Jax to of course.

As the car pulled up to the garage I heard loud music being blasted out from inside the club house. Yellowy light was coming out from every window. There were a few people standing outside, smoking, drinking and talking. Among them was Gemma. When she spotted me and the doctor she excused herself from her current company and made her way over to us with a smile.

"Well, you girls clean up nicely", she smirked eyeing us both before giving both of us hugs and kissing us on the cheek.

"Thank you, you don't look too shabby yourself", I smiled pleasantly at her. Doctor Knowles looked a little bit shocked. Perhaps she wasn't used to people speaking like that to Gemma.

"Hah, very funny missy", Gemma stooped over me. "You girls better get in before you freeze your pretty little asses off", with a glance at my bare legs and a smirk she waltzed in through the open door. I couldn't do anything but follow.

Inside it was steamy hot. It smelled of alcohol, gasoline and something else, something unidentifiable. There were scantily clad women everywhere. As a woman in a bikini top and super-short jean shorts walked past me, I suddenly felt overdressed. There were men in the bar too, most of them engaged in "conversation" with the females. The air was a bit smoky and I couldn't make out the whole room. Doctor Knowles went over to Jax and Gemma pulled me in the direction of a big clump of people. I recognized Clay and a few others from the hospital but I couldn't remember the names.

"Hey everybody, this is Ashley, remember I told you about her", Gemma placed her hand on my shoulder.

"Hi", I lifted my hand slowly.

"Hey, I'm Opie", the one with the beard on the left said. His eyes were sad. I don't know why, but that was the first thing that caught my attention.

The rest of the group introduced themselves as Bobby, Chibs and Tig. The last one, Tig had this strange look about him. His eyes were fierce and a bit crazy looking. I was a bit intimidated by him and I didn't like the way he kept eyeing my legs. But then I forgot all about what I was doing. Because when I turned around I came face to face with the most stunning chest I had ever encountered. Pity that it was covered by a white wife beater though. I looked up at Juice and smiled. His eyes were not exactly on my face. His jaw had dropped and his stare seemed to intensify as it travelled up my body.

"Dude, my eyes are up here", I joked, even though I loved the way he was looking at me.

"Oh? Yeah? Sorry what?" He seemed confused for a second; I raised an eyebrow at him. "Well, I mean, I don't usually see you this made up princess", he smirked.

"Yeah, well I don't usually get this made up".

"Aw, so it's for me? You really didn't need to do that", he teased me.

"Who says it's for you? I heard there are a few decent looking guys here…" I trailed off, waiting for his reaction.

"What? No! Cover yourself woman! Do you know how many horny men there are in this place?" He looked as if he was only half-joking. His eyes seemed a little bit panicky.

"And do _you _know how many half-naked women there are in this place? So I promise you, those horny men will be well occupied", I pointed out.

"Yes, but none of them are half as hot as you are in that dress, so yes, cover yourself up!" He moved to cover me from the eyes of the men in the bar. I smiled at his behavior. He was acting like an over-protective older brother.

"Yeah yeah, sure", I sighed.

The following two hours went by fast. I talked to all of Juice's friends from the club and danced with Doctor Knowles and even with Juice. _Especially _with Juice. I loved the way our bodies moved together in synch with the music. It wasn't overly sexual or anything, but it still felt extremely intimate. I wanted to press myself closer to him, and feel my body mould itself to his. But I didn't.

The night was going great. Until it wasn't anymore. I'd excused myself from Juice and the rest of the guys to use the bathroom. When I came out I looked over to the bar where I'd left Juice. And I didn't like what I saw.

A tall woman, clad in the shortest skirt I'd ever seen and a top that was basically a strip of fabric strategically placed over her enormous breasts, was standing beside Juice. Well, actually it was more like hanging on him. As her hand squeezed his bicep I felt my stomach drop. _I was supposed to be the one to do that_. The disgusting slut leaned down and whispered something in his ear. He smiled at her and answered. She looked surprised at first, but then quickly smiled at him and murmured something before hugging him. I had to get away. Or else I was going to be sick.

We had decided that Juice was going to drop me off after the party, but since he was otherwise occupied, I had no choice but to go home by myself. I couldn't bear to ask Doctor Knowles or Gemma for a ride, so I merely grabbed my jacket and headed for the door. I knew I was close to tears, but I wouldn't start crying in the middle of the clubhouse. Tears would have to wait for when I got home.

Of course he would want someone like her. She was so totally his type. Someone who would look good on his arm, someone experienced. Not some pathetic little teenage girl who babysat for a living and who'd only ever had one lover. Of course I wasn't good enough. Of course I wasn't up to his standards. I walked briskly down the dark road.

_Juice POV_

The party was going great and I couldn't wait for Ashley to arrive. I knew this wasn't really her scene, but the fact that she had agreed to come made me ecstatic. I was all nervous. I kept bouncing in my seat, waiting for her to walk through the door. I'd chosen my cleanest beater and even used some of that cologne stuff that I normally wasn't too interested in. Yes, as previously stated, this girl was turning me into a fucking pussy. But then again, I didn't try too hard to prevent it.

As I scanned the room I noticed Gemma and Tara talking to some of the boys. And with them was a third girl. She was smaller than the two other women. Her legs were creamy white as they disappeared under the short black dress she was wearing. Her ass was round and extremely well-proportionate. It couldn't be…? No, that would be impossible. She couldn't be, could she? As I made my way toward the group I heard her name being said. Shit it was her.

Just as I was coming up behind her she turned, and we came face to face. Which meant that I got to see the front of her as well. And what a front that was. High heels graced her tiny feet. Her shoulders were completely bare and her… _chest area _looked… aw fuck it, her boobs looked fucking _amazing_! I had trouble tearing my eyes away from the luscious goodness before me. She said something about her eyes being up somewhere and I had to take a moment to get my act together. I asked her if she had worn all of this for me. _God, how I wished that she'd say yes._ And then she had to drop the bomb that perhaps she was wearing this to catch the attention of some of the men in the club. Other men. Other men than me. So yes, that was totally not acceptable.

I tried to keep her by my side the entire night. We danced and talked. And danced some more. Her body moved in ways I'd never seen before. Her movements were slight, often a little unnoticeable, but oh so erotic. Her hips swayed from side to side and her hair fell in her face. I wanted to be closer to her, and I could sense that she wanted the same thing. But I wasn't going to let it get too far. I knew I had to take it slow. She was inexperienced and young, and in this situation I had to be the mature one. Shit, listen to me, I almost sounded like a mature adult here. That was new for me.

As Ashley made her way to the bathroom, I sat at the bar sipping my coke slowly (I was driving her home tonight and I wasn't about to cause her any intentional harm). I felt a hand on my thigh. As I looked up I saw Marjorie. She was one of the hang-arounds of Samcro. She always came to the parties and all the members had, during one point or another _enjoyed her company_. I'm not going to lie; I'd been one of them. And emphasizing the past tense, since I was recently a changed man. But it was only common courtesy to speak to her. She leaned down to my ear and whispered:

"Finally you're alone. So when are you going to ditch jailbait and have some fun with me", I could tell she was trying to be seductive, but her raspy voice sounded like crack-whore selling herself.

"Thank you for the offer" I smiled dryly. "But I think I'm kind of in love with the _jailbait_." I was surprised myself at this confession, yet I wasn't completely uncomfortable with it.

"Really?" She seemed surprised. "Well then I'm happy for you", she smiled genuinely and hugged me. Because she probably knew just as well as I did, that finding something like that in the kind of world we live in, was not the easiest thing to do.

When Marjorie left I hadn't even taken a gulp of coke before I felt a strong claw of a hand squeeze my shoulder.

"What the fuck are you doing Juice?" Gemma's voice was hard. She looked at me sternly.

"What? With Marjorie?" I asked, a bit stunned at the intensity of her stare.

"Yes, of course with her! If you're still playing the field that's fine by me, but don't drag Ashley into it. She's far too nice and far too good for you".

"I'm not dragging her into anything, Marjorie was coming onto me and I declined her offer", I said indignantly.

"Well that's not what Ashley saw. She saw you cozying up with some woman."

"Shit. Where is she?" I looked around the room. I was fucked.

"She's not here. She left. And I don't think she went by car".

"I gotta go after her." I said, thinking of her wandering the streets alone at night. My stomach tightened and I tried to push away the sick feeling in my chest.

"Atta boy", Gemma smiled and stepped aside to let me pass.

I hopped on to my bike and roared down the driveway. She couldn't have gotten far. After about five minutes I saw her. She was walking down the sidewalk, swaying on her high heels and shoulders crouched toward her body. If I didn't know better, I'd say that she was sniveling a bit too.

I cut the engine and sprang of the bike and ran to her. I placed myself in her way. She looked up at me with sad eyes, brimming with tears.

"What are you doing here?" She asked in a quiet voice.

"Looking for you of course", I said as if it was the most logical thing in the world. Which it was. "Why'd you run out on me like that?"

"It looked like you had your hands full", she said with sad irony.

"What?" I didn't know what to say so I played the dumb card. Which I shouldn't have done. It only seemed to infuriate her.

"What? _What_? I'll tell you what! I do everything I can to gain your attention. I even wore these freaking heels for you! _Just for you!_ And after all that, you still choose to be that skanky ass hoe! As if I'm not good enough for you! I can't be the experienced sexual woman you want! I'm sorry, but if that's what you're looking for, I can't help you! It just hurts so much, because I really, really like you and you're not like anyone I've ever met and…" her voice trailed off and I stood there stunned. Did she just confess that she had feelings for me? Feeling that went beyond lust? Could I really be this lucky?

She started to walk away, and I realized that I hadn't responded to her sudden outburst. I ran up to her on more time.

"Ashley", I beckoned her. "Ashley, I don't know how to say this, because I really suck with words, but I feel that too. I feel things for you that I haven't felt for anyone before." I figured total honesty was the only way to go. "I can't get enough of you. When we're apart I want to be where you are, when we're together I want to be closer. I want all those things and it scares the living piss out of me", I confessed. "I don't know what's happening to me, but all I know is that when you are around you make it better. You make _me _better." I didn't even know that I was feeling half of the stuff I was saying until I'd said them. And no words had ever been truer. "Ashley… I don't know, but I think I love you".

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><p><strong>Thank You for reading! I hope you liked it! Feel free to leave me some love in the reviews! Now I'm off to bed because I am dead tired! But you can be sure that I will be dreaming of Juice (as I'm sure some of you will be too) ;)<strong>

**Love,**

**Nat**


	9. Chapter 9  Item?

**AN: Hi! So, I've been superbusy this past week, with essays and tests at Uni as well as moving around A LOT of furniture at home. Okay enough with the excuses, but I'm really sorry this chapter took so long. I don't know why, but it took a while to write. In any case I hope you enjoy it!**

**A concern some of you had was the age difference between Ashley and Juice. Most of you mean that 19 isn't that young, and I totally agree with that (I'm twenty myself). But the thing is, I researched Theo Rossi a little and it turns out he was born in 1975. Which would make him about 36 today. And even if the character of Juice is lets say, 30-32, it's still quite a big age difference. They are in different points in life, and even though I'm sure the age difference won't pose a huge threat to their relationship, I'm still certain that it might be something that can create problems in their life together. (haha, listen to me, I, the author, don't even know yet!)**

**I hope that cleared up a few things! And now I'll let you read the chapter. Enjoy!**

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><p><strong>Chapter IX – Item?<strong>

_Ashley POV_

"Ashley… I don't know, but I think I love you. And that was what I told that woman at the bar! That all I want is you!"

Suddenly everything got really quiet. The street around us started to get a little blurry. I felt my entire body go numb. I couldn't feel my fingers and my arms just hung there like dead meat. All I could focus on was the man in front of me. His arms were outstretched, frozen as if waiting for my reaction and beckoning me to come closer. His eyes looked a little bit scared but what shone through most was resolve. Despite his apparent confusion and vulnerability he seemed to be determined that this was what he wanted. Me.

My mouth refused to work with me. I tried to make myself speak, but my voice failed me. So, I did the next best thing – I walked into his waiting arms and pressed myself to him as close as I could. I felt the rigid muscles in his back ease and his shoulders slump as he circled his arms around me and squeezed me tightly. For the first time in months I felt at home. Here, in this leather smelling embrace was where I belonged. As I pressed my nose into his chest he sighed and kissed the top of my head. I didn't want to let go yet. I wanted to stay in this bubble for a little while longer.

After a while of just holding on to one another, Juice slowly loosened his grip on me and I had to look up into his eyes. Though his eyes were usually extremely dark, they now shone with light as a huge smile spread across his face. I couldn't help but smile back.

"Can I offer you a ride home, princess?" he whispered.

"Yes please", I squeaked.

When we made it to his bike he handed over his helmet to me and sat on the bike, patting the seat behind him.

"I've never been on a motorcycle before", I admitted

"Really? Well then, hold on tightly", he chuckled.

I jumped on the bike (yes, I literally had to jump because, as said, I'm not the tallest person) and clasped my hands around him.

"You're gonna need to hold on tighter than that", he smiled as he started the engine.

As the bike roared to life and took off, I understood his point. I clung to him as if my life depended on it (which it actually kind of did). My cheek pressed into his leather cut as we blew down the streets of Charming. Even though I had never been a particular fan of speed, the ride was exhilarating and over way too soon.

Juice followed me to my door and as I turned toward him I was surprised at the sad look on his face.

"What's the matter?" I asked, concerned.

"Nothin'… I just… We're a… _thing _now, aren't we?" He barely met my eyes.

"Uhm… a thing how?" I was puzzled.

"You know, _a thing_, an _item_…" His insecure demeanor, although unnecessary, was completely adorable.

"Oh, you mean if we're a couple? Like in a relationship?" I decided to tease him a bit.

"Uhm… yeah?" He pushed his hands deep into his pockets.

"Well… I don't know…" I started and saw in his eyes that he was starting to panic. "…I have to try something first", I said and moved closer to him. I stood up on my tiptoes and pressed my lips to his. It took a moment for him to respond but when he did, he did it with fervor. One of his hands circled my waist and the other pressed against the back of my head. I brought my arms around his neck and held on. He lifted me off my feet with ease and continued to kiss me. I had never been kissed like this. It was sweet and tentative, but at the same time so all-consuming. When he finally sat me down I had to catch my breath. I looked up at him and smiled.

"Definitely an item", I said as I gave him a peck on the cheek, turned and walked into my apartment.

_Juice POV_

My knees were weak when I finally got home. My knees were actually _fucking _weak. Seriously? I'd probably be watching Titanic and re-runs of _7__th__ Heaven _when this girl was done with me.

And then it hit me. Did I just ask Ashley (the girl of my dreams) to go steady with me? And did she just agree to do just so? I think that might have been what happened. Unless this was all a dream. Which I'm pretty sure might be the case, considering that Ashley had actually kissed me. Fucking kissed me with those soft, warm lips. And I had the opportunity to kiss her back, to feel her body molding against mine. I could still smell her rosy scent (or maybe I was just imagining, 'cause I hear that's what people in love do) on me. I wanted more. I wanted her. Here in my bed. I wanted to be surrounded by her scent and her smooth skin and velvety lips. But I knew that that would have to wait. Because for once in my life I was going to do things the right way. And it didn't matter how much I wanted her, I was going to wait for her, let her set the pace. Because I was afraid that if I didn't, I might end up losing her. And that, ladies and gentlemen, was something I didn't think I could handle.

_Ashley POV_

I woke up early on Sunday to my phone beeping. I rolled over and sleepily felt around for it on my nightstand. When I finally found it and read the text I couldn't help the smile that crept across my face.

_**Hi princess, wanna do sumthin today?**_

_**Sure, what do you have in mind?**_

_**I was thinking taking a ride on the bike up to Chaffee Zoo or sumthin. Sound good?**_

_**Yeah, great actually :) When are we going?**_

_**I'm outside ur house now so whenever ur ready ;)**_

_**Dude, I just woke up, I'm in my PJ's… fancy some breakfast?**_

_**Coming up!**_

I smiled at that and got out of bed to open the door for him. I had barely made it there when I heard a knock on the door. I opened the door and smiled at him. Damn he was fine! Even though it was early, he looked well-rested, which I'm sure I didn't.

"Good morning gorgeous", his voice was all perky and giddy. He looked down at me and quickly leaned in for a kiss and a swift hug.

"Morning", I grumbled and snuggled into his chest.

After a while we disentangled and I went over to the kitchen area to prepare some breakfast. I decided on eggs on toast and coffee, as it was still early and I wasn't about to bust out the big guns, no matter how smitten I was by the man who had now taken his seat at my kitchen table.

"Need any help?"

"Nope, it's fine", I shrugged as I cracked the eggs in the pan and moved to put the slices of bread in the toaster. "So, how come you're waking me up at the ass-crack of dawn? I though the zoo wasn't that far from here?" I questioned, mostly to have something to say.

"Maybe I have other plans too", he smirked.

"Like what?"

"Like I don't know…" he smiled sheepishly. "We can do whatever you want", he spread his arms emphasizing his point. My kitchen was so small that he banged his elbow against the wall.

"Hrm…", I mused. "Couldn't we just ride on your bike for a while?" I was eager to ride it, and I had a feeling that it would be something he enjoyed too.

"Yeah sure, you really liked it?" He looked at me with an arched eyebrow.

"Loved it!" I gushed. "But we have to go really fast", I winked at him.

"Yeah, sure, but not too fast though, don't want you to get hurt", he mumbled the last part. I turned to him and flopped down into his lap.

"Thank you for caring about my safety, but I'll be fine", I assured him.

We ate our breakfast in quiet companionship. It was crazy how comfortable everything was. I wasn't sure if it was because of our previous, easy-going, friendly relationship or if it was just the way we were, but the whole thing felt really domestic. And I wasn't one to complain.

_Juice POV_

As soon as I woke up on Sunday morning I was assaulted by images of last night. Of the girl that had haunted my dreams. Of her soft lips and her declaration of _affection_. Because it hadn't escaped me. The fact that I was the only one who had declared actual love as the cause behind my actions. Not that it bothered me too much; she would fall in love with me – eventually. I had realized last night that that was to be my mission, making Ashley fall for me. Because I knew that I would never be able to part from her. Not unless she asked me to.

So as soon as I was out of the shower that morning, I flew through the clubhouse, jumped on the bike and blew into town. My first task was to buy her a helmet. Because there was no way I was letting her use my scrappy piece of plastic to protect her pretty little head. I decided on the biggest, thickest monstrosity I could find. And I didn't mind that it was a pale pink color either.

When I arrived at her apartment building I texted her. When I found out she was only in her PJ's I all but flew up the stairs and banged on her door. Not that anything was going to happen (anything other than kissing that is), but the chance to see her in the clothes she wore to bed triggered something in me. Maybe it was the intimacy of seeing someone in that state of dress (or undress in Ashley's case). When I opened the door the sight before me was indescribable. Her hair was a crown of wild disarray around her head, hairs sticking out in every direction. The only thing she had on was a gray Led Zeppelin T-shirt. It ended right on the middle of her thigh. Her creamy white thigh. To look like less of an ogling perv, I leaned in to kiss her swiftly and then pulled her in for a hug. As she snuggled into me I inhaled her scent. And that's when I knew I was home. And fuck if it didn't feel good.

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><p><strong>Thank you so much for reading this little fic of mine! It truly means a lot! I've never uploaded anything like this (never dared to), and the response is a little overwhelming:) I really appreciate all of you who review, favorite and ESPECIALLY read this. You are AWESOME.<strong>

**Thank you, now I have to go do that boring stuff they call school work... But I promise I'll be working on the next chapter as well ;) _Perhaps if you review, I'll get it written quicker? :P_**

**Love, **

**Nat**


	10. Chapter 10  Secrets

**AN: Sorry I suck at updating, but I am SUPERSWAMPED with school and work (and overbearing mothers). Anyway, here comes a chapter (finally). It's not superinteresting or anything, but I hope that it will give y'all a look into Ashley and her past. And if I do say so myself, I think the chapter is kinda sweet:) In any case, I'm going to stop with the ramblings. Enjoy!**

**Chapter X - Secrets**

_Ashley POV_

The following weeks were… frustrating. Don't get me wrong, Juice was everything a good boyfriend should be, attentive and supportive. He always made me feel appreciated and loved. But there was one area in which our relationship was lacking. And that would be the physical area. I mean, we kissed and touched, but it never went beyond that. It always felt as if he was _handling me with care_, as if I was made out of thin paper.

I'd only ever been in one relationship before, which didn't give me a lot to go by, but seriously, weren't we past the holding hands-stage? My previous boyfriend had been all for moving our relationship to the next level, but Juice seemed determined to not even go there. Our relationship seemed almost platonic at times.

Our relationship as friends was growing more and more solid though. We were getting closer and closer and I always felt at ease with him. Well, almost always. There was a certain frustration that came with having a freaking monk for a boyfriend. I mean, I wasn't the most experienced of girls, but I wouldn't mind him having his way with me, if you know what I mean.

But every time I tried anything, even just lightly slipping my hands under the hem of his shirt, he always pushed me away. I'm not going to lie, the rejection stung a little, and I started to wonder if it was something about me he didn't like.

I'd never really observed my outer appearance too much. I mean I'd looked in mirrors and seen myself, but I'd never really regarded my body in a critical light. I found myself doing it more and more. Not that I thought that Juice was going to leave me because of my exterior, but I was desperately seeking answers for his celibate ways. I mean, I knew I didn't look anything like the girls he'd been with before. Because I knew he hadn't lived his life like a catholic priest. I mean, just look at the woman I'd seen him with at the bar, all legs and blond hair, not to mention the biggest boobs I'd ever seen on a woman (seriously, it looked like she might tip over). How could I compete with that?

As I regarded myself in the mirror, I was not exactly pleased with what I saw. I'd stripped down into my underwear and my reflection in the mirror stared judgingly back at me. What caught my attention first was the tummy. It wasn't big or anything, but it jutted out just a bit more than would be considered attractive. My hips were a little too wide for my height and my legs were short. My breasts were actually quite alright, nothing like the plastic bombs the blonde possessed, but still kind of nice, round heavy weights. My shoulders were not as majestic and wide as I'd like them to be, they kind of reminded me of a skiing hills, the way they declined from my neck. My eyes travelled up to my face. It was alright, I guess. It's hard to look at yourself in an objective way, but I guess it was kind of attractive. In a quirky kind of way. I mean, I'm no Catherine Zeta-Jones, and I'll never will be, but my features meshed into a nice combination. Not really sexy, but nice.

Great. Maybe that was why Juice refused to _seal the deal. _He thought I was nice looking, nice enough to spend time with, but not sexy enough to go to bed with. I turned away from the mirror and pulled on a shirt. This kind of thinking was not productive.

_Juice POV_

I woke up with a hard-on the size of a fucking beluga whale. Again. It was something that had started when Ashley and I started to get more intimate. Because that was what it was – _intimate_. We hadn't done anything besides kissing, yet it was still the most erotic thing I'd ever done with someone of the opposite sex. Maybe it was that our relationship was built on a solid friendship, or maybe it was because it was _her_. Whatever it was, I was sure as shit clinging on to it by a death grip.

Our make out-sessions were both the sweet heaven and the cruel torture of hell. Feeling her lips pressing against mine, brushing lightly was the sweetest thing I'd ever known. Her tiny hands tugging at my neck and shirt were (although amazing) quite torturous though. Because it made me want to go further, undress her, ravish her. And she wasn't ready for that. Heck, _I _wasn't ready for that. I didn't know if I would be able to control myself if I got her naked and in my bed. I didn't know if I would be able to cherish her and love her the way she deserved. So I fucking waited. And tried to ignore the hurt look on her face when I pushed her wandering hands away.

We were at her apartment, lounging in front of her TV, watching some old flick with Marlon Brando. I didn't really care about the movie, but Ashley seemed to have a thing for Brando, as she was completely engrossed in the movie. I took the opportunity to do what had become one of my favorite activities as of late. I watched her. It was crazy. She had like a million different expressions. I noticed that she scrunched her nose when she got skeptical (fucking adorable), when she was really deep in thought she kind of looked out into space and knit her eyebrow together and when she laughed her dimples made an appearance. I loved her dimples the most, so I tried to make her laugh as often as possible. Yes, I was a pussy.

* * *

><p>As the film ended she rose from her place (snuggled into my side, lying half on top of me with her head on my chest) and turned off the TV and put on some music. Then she returned to the couch and nestled into me again. The slow lull of the music seemed to calm her. I decided this was as good a time as any to ask her about what had been bothering me for weeks now.<p>

"Ashley", I ventured, checking if she had fallen asleep already.

"Mm", she said quietly, but not sleepily.

"You never talk about why you came here, about your family, I mean", I tried to come off as merely a little curious. She raised her head a little to look into my eyes. Something in her head seemed to click and she nodded before laying her head back down on my chest and telling me her story.

"Well, my family is kind of the reason I moved here in the first place. You see, I come from Wilmington, originally and that was where I grew up. I was an only child and more than a little spoiled. I had the best parents in the world", she said this with such a sad tone, that I wasn't sure if she meant it. She drew a deep breath and continued.

"My mother is a kindergarten teacher. She's warm and my best friend. Everybody loves her. She's just that kind of person that you are instantly drawn to, you know? My dad has always been the perfect contrast to my mom. He's the realistic one, the one that brings her down a little if she goes soaring too high. He's always been the most constant part of my life. Well, until recently. You see, when I came home one afternoon after studying at the library I heard them fighting. My mother and father who _never_ fight. I listened to their argument and it sent freaking chills through me". She shivered even as she remembered and I silently tightened my hands around her.

"Dad was shouting something about living a lie and not knowing who we were. At first I didn't understand. He was somehow telling my mom that he didn't know her or me and that he was angry and confused. The worst part of it all though, was when he said that he was going to leave. I burst out from my hiding place behind a door and begged him not to leave. I cried and clung to him, making a real spectacle of myself. But he left anyway. He just grabbed his already packed suitcase and slammed the door on his way out. I cried for hours and when I finally calmed down my mom told me what she had told my father. Apparently I wasn't his child. This came as a huge chock to me of course, I'd always prided myself on taking after my dad more than my mom, and here she was, telling that we weren't even related?

"My mother went on to tell me how their marriage had hit a rough patch and this was, apparently, about nine months before I was born. But I didn't want to hear it. So I took all the money that I had and decided to get as far away from her as possible. I had a few options when it came to schools, but I decided on California, as I couldn't think of a place farther away. And so I moved here." She finished simply. But I could feel her tears wetting my shirt. I stroked her hair.

"So, have you had any contact with your mom since you left?" I asked.

"Naw, not too much, I sent her a postcard, so she'd know that I got here safely", her voice was tiny.

"And your dad?"

"I haven't heard from him since he left."

"That's some tough shit baby", I tried to put myself in her shoes. Abandoned by the man she regarded as her everything. Shit, even I had trouble grasping it.

"Yeah, I know. It sucks. Especially that he just left like that. As if our emotional bonds were cut off as soon as our biological. I've never felt as expendable as I did then". Her sigh permeated the air. I looked at the clock. It was getting late, but there was no way in hell that I was going to leave her here by herself after a conversation like that. So, I would break one of my own rules. I would sped the night with my girl.

"Baby, it's getting late. Mind if I stay tonight?" I whispered. She lifted her head and her teary eyes looked at me quizzically.

"No, you little perv, I'm not going to take advantage of you in your current stage", I chuckled at her expression. "I just don't want you to be alone tonight". She smiled.

"Thank you".

We got ready for bed in silence. This was another thing that was new to me. I'd never slept with a woman without actually _sleeping with _her. And yet, it felt more intimate than anything I'd experienced before. As we settled into her bed, I pulled the fluffy sheets over our bodies and automatically pulled her into me. Her arm wound my torso and her hand squeezed my side. I sighed contentedly and closed my eyes, relishing in the fact that my girl had actually confided in me and told me about her secrets. I fell asleep that night, grateful for the course my life had taken, for my family and most of all, grateful for the beautiful woman sleeping in my arms.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: <strong>

Oh, and btw, the movie they were watching is "A Streetcar Named Desire". Marlon Brando is absolutely yummy in it, and everyone who likes handsome, yet horribly ill-behaved men, should defintely check it out;) Next update will probably take a while, because this term at Uni is ending next week and I have quite a few assignments piled up. I'll hope to post one (or two) chapters by wednesday or something like that.

Please feel free to read and review!

Love,

Nat


	11. Chapter 11  I Put A Spell On You

**AN: SORRY for not posting sooner. I was away for work for a week and then I just got a bit lazy :/ Please forgive me!**

**This chapter is mainly a filler, but it contains some important stuff nevertheless.**

**Oh, and there was someone who was worried about Ashley's bilogical dad being a Son... No, he is not:) I'm not gonna lie, I toyed with the idea, but it just felt a little bit incestuous... Because all of the Sons are like brothers, and Juice being a brother and... you know... Okay, maybe it's just in my head, bu in any case, I chose not to make daddy dearest a member of the SAMCRO.**

**Okay, I'll let you read now;)**

**Chapter XI – I Put A Spell On You**

_Ashley POV_

When I woke up I was warm. A little too warm. It might've had something to do with the human blanket that was completely covering me. I smiled into my pillow. Juice had finally spent the night. Granted, it wasn't really what I had envisioned when I fantasized about our first night together, but this was way too nice to pass up.

Even though I was beyond comfortable in Juice's embrace, I was getting a little sweaty. And something told me that that wouldn't be a huge turn on for any guy (unless they had some weird fetish about it or something. I mean, it happens!). I started to edge toward the side of the bed. Or let me rephrase that, I was _trying _to edge toward the side, but as soon as I'd wiggled a few inches, Juice's arms tightened around me and his brow wrinkled in his sleep. As I tried to wriggle further, he let out a small sound. It was almost like a tiny whimper, but I couldn't be sure.

After a few minutes he seemed to relax a bit and I took this opportunity to slink out of his arms and run to the bathroom. I tried to tiptoe as quickly and quietly as I could across the room, trying not to wake the kind, beautiful man that slept in my bed.

_Juice POV_

When I woke up I rolled over to reach for Ashley. It was funny how quickly I had become accustomed to sleeping with her, and how I was starting to subconsciously orient myself around her. But what wasn't as funny was what I found when I rolled over in search for the girl in question. Which was _nothing_. I sleepily felt around for her with my hand, but the sheets were cool and empty. They still smelled like her though, and for a few seconds, I relished in her scent and buried my nose deep in her pillow.

But soon enough I remembered that the real thing was so much better, and decided to get up and find the girl that could turn my brain into mush with just her scent.

I got out of bed and headed out into the hall. I heard music coming from the kitchen and the distinct smell of pancakes. I followed the scent down the hall and found her in the kitchen.

The radio was blasting Screamin Jay Hawkins and in the middle of the kitchen, covered in flour, stood the sexiest girl to ever walk this planet. She was clad in merely a pair of short shorts and a big grey t-shirt with the REO Speedwagon logo on it. Her hips swayed to the music on the radio as she stirred something in a plastic bowl. She sang the lyrics as she poured some of the content into a waiting frying pan.

_I put a spell on you  
>'cause you're mine<em>

You better stop the things you do  
>I ain't lyin'<br>No I ain't lyin'

As she turned around she spotted me. Instead of quieting down and looking embarrassed, like most girls would, she continued to sing and dragged me into it by pulling on my hands and forcing me to join her.

What started out as innocent fun quickly escalated into something else. The distinct beat of the song made us swing in unison and our touches soon turned more intense. I enveloped her from behind and gripped her hips. I let my hands travel the path from her ribs down to her thighs, squeezing a little tighter with each pass.

I knew I was getting dangerously close to crossing my own boundaries. But there was something about the song that brought out the animal in me. It felt primal, as if we weren't in control of our actions, as if it was only human or perhaps animalistic nature. It felt right.

As the song ended we stilled. For a long time none of us said a word. The only thing I could hear was the sound of our breathing. Which had picked up a little during the course of the song.

We slowly disentangled from each other and pretended to be busy. Ashley turned back to her pancakes and I busied myself with setting the table (one of those kitchen area/island thingies that are supposed to save space) and taking out the orange juice from the fridge and various toppings that could go on pancakes. I found myself wondering what she preferred.

_Ashley POV_

As I flipped the last pancake I sneaked a glance at Juice. What had just transpired between us was… _hot_, for lack of a better word. It was so intense. I had never felt such a powerful pull toward anyone. And contrary to most cases, the more time we spent with each other, the stronger the attraction became. Yet, we never talked about it. It was as if the big elephant in the room was _sex_. I had no idea where Juice stood when it came to expressing our affection physically. And by this rate, I'd probably never know.

I decided to take the bull by the horns.

"So, that was… _nice_", I hedged as I put our plates on the table and sat down. Juice smirked.

"Yeah… _nice_"_, _he muttered. Shit, this was going to be difficult. I didn't have any experience talking about sex. Especially not to guys. And even more especially to hot guys with mohawks, who were super experienced in that field.

"So, yeah… uhm… I was just kinda thinking that it would be nice to do that again sometime…", _okay, almost there…_ I was hoping he was going to catch my drift, but to my utter disappointment, he looked completely lost.

"Huh? Dance?" his brows arched.

"Well, yeah… and other things…", okay, I was sounding like a twelve year old girl who couldn't explain where she lost her Barbie…

"Other things? As in?"

"You know… _more."_ I finally spat out. It was kind of what I had planned to say.

"More?" his brows wrinkled and then suddenly all the muscles in his face went slack. His complexion went white and I almost feared he'd had a stroke or something. Slowly he exhaled and said breathily "_more_", as if understanding what I meant.

He sat there for a while, not touching his pancakes. Okay, that wasn't really the reaction I'd anticipated. You know, when you tell the guy you're dating that you want to engage in intercourse, you're kind of expecting… something other than this.

"Are you sure?" he croaked. "Because you really have to be sure, you know. This isn't something you can take back, you know…" He was getting a little frantic and I quickly stopped him.

"What? Why? It's not like I'm a virgin, so it's going to be completely fine", I tried to calm him. It didn't _exactly _work. His face went from pale white to burning red in a matter of moments. I stared at him in quiet wonder.

"Who", he finally wheezed. He sounded as if he was in the middle of an asthma attack.

"Just this guy I used to date back in Wilmington", I shrugged. I barely thought about him anymore, it wasn't as if it was particularly memorable. "He turned out to be a bit of a creep".

Juice was fuming. Although I had no idea why.

"It's not that big of a deal", I tried to calm him. "Really, it's not like I'm still thinking of him or having any contact with the guy", I started digging into my pancakes. After a while Juice did the same. We finished our breakfast and began to get ready for the day. All talk about sex was apparently postponed. For now.

_Juice POV_

She _wasn't _a virgin? It wasn't as if I had anything against it, I had just always thought that she was. The first feeling I felt was not, to my surprise, relief, but rather disappointment. Disappointment over that I wasn't there first. I wanted to be her special person, her first. The one she would remember forever.

And then the way she just shook it off, as if it didn't matter. The creep had taken her virginity and she didn't think anything of it. Wasn't the first time supposed to be perfect? At least for girls, right? At least for _this _girl.

After breakfast (which was a little bit burnt, but otherwise awesome) I drove her to school. Apparently she had some sort of group meeting concerning some sort of project. As we pulled up to the building (in which I would never step my foot) I saw two people coming up to us. The first one was a curvaceous brunette. She wore… _interesting _clothes. Skintight pink jeans were paired off with some sort of white fur thing. It was all very… _interesting_. The guy beside her was tall and gangly. His hair was curly and he wore glasses. He seemed rather harmless. That was until I saw _my girl _enveloping him. Okay, granted, she hugged the girl too, but I was too busy stewing in my big pot of jealousy to pay attention. She introduced them as Theo and Gabi. I wanted to kill this Theo-character for even looking at her. What kind of name was Theo anyway? It sounded like a gay Italian pornstar. And no, don't ask me how I came up with that.

When I was introduced as her boyfriend I straightened my back and shook both their hands (the Theo guy's a little bit harder than necessary, just to get my point across). They soon made their way into the school talking about sub-clauses and auxiliaries and whatnot.

I felt a pang in my chest. This was a part of her. A big part. It was also a part that could never share with her. I wasn't smart, I had never been especially intelligent, but I had never felt like this before. In the Sons I was someone they could rely on. There I was contributing. In company with Ashley and her friends I felt like the village idiot.

She was so smart, beautiful and gentle. She deserved someone who could provide her with deep conversations, surprise her with ballet tickets and a dinner at a fancy restaurant. Not a ride on a bike and a greasy burger at a local diner.

As I straddled the bike I clutched the handles tightly. The hurt and inadequacy I felt in that moment weighed down like a stone in my chest and I roared away just as my wristwatch showed 10.00.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Thank you for reading! Please feel free to review:)<strong>

**I'll be away on vacation for a week, but the good news is that I'll probably have time to outline the rest of the story:)**

**Love you guys! /Nat**

**P.s. If you havent already, you should definitely check out Screamin Jay Hawkins with _I put a spell on _you. It's super awesome and I totally recommend it. D.s.**


	12. Chapter 12  First

**AN: Hello ýou lovely people! For those of you who are interested, I had a lovely vacation:) And I also came up with the outlining for the rest of this story. If my planning is correct (which it never is:P), there should be about two or three chappies left of this baby:) And perhaps an epilogue (but we'll see).**

**In any case, sorry for the long wait, but here comes the longest chapter yet! And I do believe it's a good one:) I'm sorry if it gets a bit incoherent at times, but I'm writing this in the middle of the night, and I just wanted to publish it as quickly as possible:) Hope you like it and feel free to review:)**

**Oh, and YES, Theo is named after Theo Rossi OF COURSE! I just couldn't resist:P**

**Chapter XII – First**

_Ashley POV_

"So dish, how is he in the sack?" Gabi was about as tactful as a bulldozer. Theo just looked really uncomfortable being privy to this discussion. He studiously examined each and every one of his peas and then started on the carrot sticks.

"Uhm…" I hedged glancing at our male friend. "I wouldn't know", I answered diplomatically.

"What do you mean?" Gabi's glossed lips formed the shape of an O. I smiled at the way Theo's gaze lingered on her a little too long.

"I mean we haven't done anything besides kiss", I shrugged.

"WHAT? You haven't _done the deed_?" she half-whispered, her eyes the size of saucers.

"Uhm… no?"

"What are you waiting for? Is it him? Does he have _a little problem_?" she illustrated what she considered a problem by showing me her pinkie and looking sadly at it.

"NO!" I exclaimed, embarrassed. "Not that I'm aware of! He just thinks it's better if we wait. That it will be more special that way", I smiled thinking of Juice's concerned face.

"Oh my GOD! He sounds like a twelve year old girl!" Gabi's laughter resonated through the corridor and a few people even turned around to see what the noise was about.

"He's just concerned about my well-being", I defended my man but gave a deep sigh and looked at my friend in despair. "But i _know_. It's freaking annoying sometimes, that he has to be so chivalrous and stuff, you know? I mean, I wouldn't mind if we you know…" I let the rest of the sentence hang, letting the silence speak for itself.

"…spanked the monkey?" Gabi was quick to fill in. "You know, I think this is up to you, girl. You have to make the first move!" she stared at me and nodded encouragingly.

"Yeah, I figured as much. And I'll even let you help me come up with a plan", I smiled at her. "On one condition though".

"Sure, anything!" she sounded way too excited, and I almost regretted my decision to let her help me.

"You are never to refer to what Juice and I do in private as _spanking the monkey_." I mean, a girl has got to set some rules.

_Juice POV_

Church that day was rough. Zobelle and his boys were starting to really irritate the fuck out of us. And irritated Sons were not something you wanted to encounter. Which was why, when my phone chirped soon after lunch, I answered it with a loud angry bark.

"Juice", I was in no mood to be polite.

"Oh, is this a bad time?" the voice that came through the phone miraculously eased the tension in my muscles and made me instantly regret my harsh tone.

"No babe, it's fine, just some work stuff", I said evasively. "What's up?"

Her voice suddenly turned low and seductive. "I was just wondering if you wanted to come over tonight. You know for dinner? And other things…"

I didn't know how to interpret the way she left the sentence hang. It almost sounded as if she was proposing... _sex?_ Shit. I hadn't even let myself go there in my mind. Even imagining her, naked, under me, was too much for my sex-starved brain to handle. I was quiet for a while, so that I could get my head straight.

"Juice?" her voice sounded a bit uncertain and maybe even hurt. Shit. I needed to make this right. Maybe she was just suggesting a nice _safe _dinner at her place. Right.

"Yeah, sure, dinner sounds awesome", I _might _have come across as a little bit too eager, but I figured it couldn't hurt. "When do you want me to come by?"

"Uhm… six?"

"Yeah, okay, sex sounds great… SIX! I mean SIX sounds great!" I couldn't believe I'd just let that slip like that.

"Haha, yeah uhm sure… Freudian slip was it?" she teased me. "See you tonight".

As we hung up I dragged a hand across my face. I was in for a long night.

* * *

><p>As the digital clock on my computer screen showed five thirty I decided that it was time to get moving. I quickly finished what I was currently working on and shut the computer.<p>

I dropped off the computer at home and also decided to take a quick shower and change out of my working clothes. I pondered for a second to wear a dress shirt (the only one I owned), but soon decided against it. I had a feeling Ashley wouldn't mind me choosing to be comfortable.

As I roared into her driveway it was almost five to five. It was good to be early right? I almost felt a bit nervous as I knocked on her door. It swung open and there before me was… No, there was no way of describing it. Oh, yeah, one word would do the trick; _Ashley_.

Her body was tightly wrapped in a blue dress, showing of her curves in a way I wasn't really used to. The neckline dipped low and I think I got a glimpse of the black lace bra that pressed her breasts together into a very alluring cleavage. Her hair was down and curled around her face in gentle waves. She had a tiny bit of makeup on, but mostly she just looked flushed and actually a little bit excited.

"Hi", she smiled big and gave me a hug and a quick peck on the lips. "Come in, the food's almost done".

I followed her into her apartment and immediately smelled food. Not some sort of fancy French stuff, but steak. I soon learned that our meal tonight would consist of stake, baked potatoes and salad. Simple, yet oh so delicious.

"I'm not a super cook or anything, but I do know how to make a decent stake", she winked at me and motioned for me to sit down at the table (the breakfast bar).

"Wanna beer?"

"Can you even buy alcohol?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Uhm, no… but you know, I have my ways…" she murmured. "By which I mean a friend with a fake ID".

"Really?"

"You're not gonna call the cops on me, are you?" she said as she handed me a beer.

"Nope, wouldn't dream of it", I smiled at her as she placed the salad bowl on the table. "So this friend with the fake ID, it wouldn't be this Theo-character, would it?" I tried to sound blasé about it, but I didn't really pull it off.

"Uhm, no? Actually Gabi hooked me up… what do you mean _this Theo-character_. He's not a character Juice, he's just Theo", she sounded a bit suspicious.

"Yeah, really? _Just _Theo?" I knew I was overstepping my bounds, but I just couldn't let it go.

"Yes, Juice, _just _Theo", she sounded as if I was slightly retarded. "You know Juice, if I didn't know you better, I'd think you were jealous", she turned around and started placing the steaks on the plates. Shit, she could see right through me.

"Uhm, no, I mean… I just… _I just don't like the way he looks at you_", I murmured the last part, hoping she wouldn't hear it. But she did.

She stopped dead in her tracks but didn't turn around. For a while the kitchen was silent. Then, without warning, she turned around and flopped down into my lap. She grabbed my face with both hands and planted a big one on me. My eyes flew open in shock, but I couldn't do anything but respond, with fervor. She leaned back after a while and caressed my cheek with her thumb.

"Then you should see the way he looks at Gabi".

"What?"

"You _do _know that he is hopelessly in love with Gabi, right? I mean, you can see it radiating from like miles away", she smiled and left my lap to bring us our food.

"Really?"

"Yup, too bad Gabi is too blind to see it", she continued as we settled at her table.

The rest of the night went smoothly. We talked about everything during dinner and afterwards we settled on her couch, watching some old 80's flick.

To be honest, it all started fairly innocently. Her hand was on my thigh and after a while she started caressing it, slowly moving her hand back and forth in light touches. One thing led to another and soon… let's just say that the movie was forgotten.

I don't think I would ever get used to kissing Ashley. It always felt new or different. Her lips were always cushioning mine perfectly and there was really only one way to describe it; _we fit_. We fit together so perfectly it felt like coming home. I relished in the feeling.

Then suddenly, before I had time to react, Ashley swung her leg across me and straddled me, there on her couch. I was about to protest, but she leaned down and I caught a glimpse of her bra again before she kissed me and suddenly I couldn't remember why I was supposed to object.

Her body molded itself to mine and I couldn't help but run my hands up her bare legs. Her skin was smoother than anything I'd ever felt in my life.

Her hands started roaming. And I let them. But when they started tugging my shirt out of the way I had to stop for a second. I wanted to be clear about where this was going and if she was sure that she wanted this. I never wanted her to have any regrets concerning me.

"Babe, wait", I stilled her by clamping my hands down on her arms.

"What?" she asked in a breathy whisper and looked up at me through a wild disarray of hair. Her eyes were hooded with lust. It was an unbelievable sight.

"Are you sure about what you're doing? What we're doing?" I looked into her eyes and tried to convey all the concern I had for her.

"Yes", her answer was immediate and her gaze was locked with mine.

"Really?" I couldn't fathom that she was willing to let me into the most private thing she had. I couldn't help but ask: "Why?"

She looked confused at first, then she smiled sadly.

"Because I'm in love with you, isn't that obvious?" her smile was tiny. Fuck. She LOVED ME? This beautiful girl was actually in love with me?

"I fucking love you too", I whispered before I leaned forward and kissed her. I wove my fingers into her hair and pressed her face closer to mine and deepened the kiss. This time when she tugged at my shirt I didn't resist. I let her pull it over my head and relished in her hand on my naked skin. At this point I realized that we were still on the couch and that this was going to be quite awkward in a moment. So I put one hand around her shoulders and the other under her knees and stood up. I was surprised at how light she was. She laughed lightly and continued nibbling on my ear as I carried her bridal style into her bedroom.

I slowly sat her down on her bed and she immediately turned to me and started to untie her dress. I stopped her with a hand on hers. She looked up at me with confusion and hurt in her eyes. I smiled.

"I wanna do that", the smirk wouldn't leave my face. She just smiled and let her hands fell to her sides.

I started with the knot at her waist. I slowly undid it and started unwrapping her. I truly felt like a kid on Christmas unwrapping the only present I really wanted. The silky fabric of the dress slipped easily from her shoulders and exposed her chest. And what a glorious chest it was. I had to swallow hard before I could continue. I was mesmerized by her breasts. I couldn't help but reach for them and caress the flesh that was exposed above the lace of the bra. Holy fuck. I nearly came in my pants when my fingers lightly slid over the skin of her breasts. It was smoother than silk. Nothing I had ever felt was as good as this.

I heard Ashley clear her throat a little and that seemed to break me out of my boobie-induced trance. When I looked up at her sheepishly she just laughed a tinkling laugh and slid out of the rest of her dress. Which didn't help my case. All I could see was smooth pale skin. And all I wanted to do was devour it. I didn't know where to look first, her legs were so… hrm… _shapely_. And her hips – oh, god, her hips were just begging for my hands to grab them.

Ashley looked at me expectantly. I realized I was still half-dressed. And that wouldn't do. I reached for my fly, but her hands stopped me. I looked up at her and saw a huge Cheshire smile.

"I wanna do that", she threw my words back at me and started in on the zipper of my jeans. Which wasn't the best of ideas. Having her hands so close to my… _manhood_, made me think of things. Things that weren't helping me in my current condition. If this continued I'd blow my load in my pants before I'd even gotten her naked.

As soon as she was done with my pants I slid them down my legs and turned toward her. We stood just looking at each other for a while, but the building tension was soon going to be too much and I led her to the bed.

Before laying down she reached behind her and unsnapped her bra. It fell off her shoulders with ease and I stared. Holy fuck. That was beautiful. My hands went to her breasts out of pure magnetic pull and as my palms enveloped them she arched her back and moaned a little. And yes, Juicy Jr. almost went apeshit in my underwear.

As I bent down and kissed her my hand travelled south across her soft stomach and her luscious hips, only to rest at the edge of her black lace panties. I slowly caressed the skin just beneath the elastic with my fingertips and felt her moan into my mouth.

I finally gave into her and went lower with my hand. Her breathing was becoming more and more ragged and I could feel her gyrating against my hand. I moved my kisses to her neck to let her breathe a little.

Her own hand went to the waistband of my boxers and she slid the tips of her fingers against my skin, the same way I had done with her. It was so fucking erotic, I had to restrain the urge to rip our annoying underwear off and just ravage her.

To distract her I started pulling her panties down her thighs. They slid off easily and soon I found myself in bed with a completely naked woman. A woman I loved. A woman who loved me. I can honestly say, that I never thought I'd find myself in this situation in life. But I wasn't complaining.

She was still trying to pull my boxers down, but not exactly having any success in doing so. She huffed and I couldn't help but smile at her pouty lower lip. I quickly rose and pulled down my underwear. When I heard Ashley gasp from the bed I looked up, worried. Her eyes were huge and zooming in on my… _equipment_.

"What?" I said in a hoarse voice. Was she regretting this? Was she regretting ever telling me she loved me?

"No, uhm, nothing…" she hedged. She finally broke her gaze from my junk and looked up at me. When she saw that I wasn't buying it she bit her lip. "It's just that… uhm… Brad's _stuff _wasn't exactly that _size_…" she finally spat out.

"Brad?" I was getting confused.

"The guy I slept with in Wilmington… His _thing_ wasn't… you know… _that big"_, she whispered the last part and then turned red and looked down.

Hah! I actually had to smile at this. The fucker in Wilmington had nothing on me. Besides being a fucking creep, he had a tiny dick! I couldn't help but laugh. Ashley looked up at me through tendrils of hair.

"It's not funny! What are you laughing about?"

"I'm sorry babe", I touched her cheek and pulled her hair away from her face. "But it's a little bit funny".

"No… I mean…" she looked down again and whispered something unidentifiable.

"What? I can't hear you", I tried to sound concerned, but I was still laughing at _Brad_ and his tiny penis in my head.

"What if it won't fit?" She finally asked a little louder. Her cheeks were burning now and she wouldn't meet my eyes. She thought my penis was so big it wouldn't fit in her? On some level I knew I should be concerned and comfort her, but on another I felt a surge of manly pride. It was probably unreasonable, but it felt good to know that your woman thought you well-endowed. In a caveman kind of way.

"Babe, it's gonna be fine, I promise", I tried to calm her a bit. "We don't have to do anything more if you don't want to", Juicy Jr. wouldn't be too happy about it, but her needs had to be put first. There was no other way.

"No, I want to", she said determinedly. "Just, go slow".

And that was just what I did. I kissed each and every single spot on her body. I explored her dips and curves and memorized which spots she liked the best, where she was ticklish and what spots made her arch her back the most.

As I was exploring her bellybutton I felt her hands on my shoulders dragging me up her body until we were face to face. I was careful not to grind my junk against her, even though I desperately wanted to. She looked at me with hooded eyes and said the most magical words I had ever heard.

"Juice, make love to me".

And that was just what I did. After gloving Juicy Jr. I positioned myself over Ashley. I looked into her eyes one final time before entering her.

!

That was the only way to describe it. She was warm, tight and slick and I almost burst right there, halfway in. I looked down at the girl beneath me. Her eyes were closed and her back was arched. Her head was tossed back and gibberish was coming out of her mouth. Something close to what I just felt.

When I was all the way in she opened her eyes. I searched her face for any kind of regret or pain, but there was none. Just pure love and adoration. I mirrored her emotions and kissed her.

"You alright babe?"

"Yeah, I'm fine", she smiled. "I didn't know it could feel like this", she shrugged.

I laughed at that and the movements made me stir inside her. She sucked in a deep breath and moaned a little.

"Still alright?" I asked, worried.

"Nope", her response was. I froze. "Not if you don't start moving", she smiled and kissed my dumbstruck face.

I felt relief loosen my body as I started moving inside her. As our bodies moved in a dance older than time my hands roamed her skin and caressed her breasts, hips and thighs. Our movements became more and more frantic and soon our moans and groans filled the tiny bedroom.

My lips sucked and kissed at her neck and her nails dug into my back. I could feel that she was close. But the question was if I wasn't closer? I tried to control myself, but it was getting fucking hard (no pun intended. Or, come to think about it, punk FUCKING intended). I reached down between us and touched her just above where we were joined. Soon I felt her whole body shivering and i could feel her inner muscles tightening around me.

As her orgasm shook her she called out my name and arched on the bed. I finally let myself fall with her and nothing had ever been as sweet. I collapsed on top of her. I moved to get off her, for fear that I was suffocating her, but her hands prevented me from moving.

"Stay", was all she said.

We fell asleep that night tightly embraced and with words of love on our lips. It was the most peaceful sleep I had ever gotten. I was content, with my woman in my arms, where I could protect her.

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><p>The shrill ring of the doorbell woke us up in the morning. Ashley stirred next to me and groaned.<p>

"I'll get it", I said, letting her sleep a bit longer. I pulled on my boxers and jeans and went to answer the door.

As I opened it I found a woman outside. She was quite small and perhaps in her fifties. Her hair was deep brown with a few strands of gray. She looked a little worn.

"I'm sorry, I'm looking for Ashley Armstrong?" She said uncertainly, as if thinking she got the wrong address.

"Yeah, she lives here", I said slowly. "May I ask who's wondering?" I was I little bit intrigued.

"I'm her mother".

Holy shit.

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><p><strong>AN: DUMMDUMMDUUUUUM! So, first of all, that was my fist lemony chapter, so please if it was awful, don't be too hard on me:P Oh and next chapter will probably have some Ashley POV from the dinner date:)<strong>

**I am hoping to post the next chapter sometime next week:)**

**THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING! Please feel free to review and all that good stuff! :)**

**Love and stuff,**

**Nat 3**


	13. Chapter 13  Mommy Dearest

**AN: Okay, there's really no good excuse for my absence. I have been working and stuff, but mostly I've just felt utterly uninspired. Now that I _think_ I know where this is all going, I do believe I'll be able to put out chapters faster. In any case, I AM SO SORRY for sucking so bad.**

**This chapter is not the best ever written (and u****nfourtunatley a bit short)****, but it leads up to good stuff, I promise!**

**Thank to all of you who are still there (and to new readers), hope you enjoy it!**

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><p><strong>Chapter XIII – Mommy Dearest<strong>

_Ashley POV_

When I woke up in the morning I was deliciously sore. I stretched and groaned and looked over to the other side of the bed, expecting to see Juice's sleeping form next to me. But he wasn't there. The sheets were a mess and there was an indentation in his pillow, so I knew he had been there. I reached over and ran my hand over the sheets and found them cool. Had he left? Without telling me? Just as I was about to have a minor panic attack I heard something coming from the kitchen. It sounded like a frying pan connecting with the floor. I smiled to myself. He hadn't left me.

I rose from the bed and put one of my big sleeping t-shirts on. I didn't bother with any underwear; it sort of felt redundant in this situation. I made my way through the door and over to the kitchen area. And what I saw there had me desperately regretting my decision not to wear any panties.

My half-naked boyfriend was trying to turn on my stove while balancing a pack of eggs in his other hand. His broad, tattooed back twisted in ways that made my mouth water and the urge to jump him was almost too strong to resist. The only thing that restrained me was the fact that we were not alone. At the tiny breakfast bar sat none other than my dear old mommy. She looked pretty much the same as the last time I'd seen her. Maybe a little older, more worn.

At first I was at a loss for words. What was she doing here? How had she found me? I decided that the best way to find out, was probably to just ask her. But I had trouble formulating a sentence.

"Uhm… Hi?" My first words to my mother in six months were kind of hesitant.

She turned her head quickly and looked me straight in the eye. Her eyes seemed so sad. I'd never seen her like that before. She was always calm and collected; this was not the mother I had left six months ago.

"Hi Ashley…" her entire posture as she rose from her seat seemed to ooze self-consciousness. As if she didn't know how to act in this situation. And to be perfectly honest, I wasn't sure myself. It all felt so surreal, my mother in my kitchen being served breakfast by my half-naked (tattooed) boyfriend? Not exactly something you can prepare yourself for.

Looking at my mother, so small and almost scared there in the middle of my kitchen area, I couldn't help but feel bad for her. All at once, all my anger toward her and her actions disappeared and all that was left was a lonely little girl, desperately longing for her mommy. So I did the only thing I could. I marched up to her and hugged her.

At first her embrace was a little tentative, as if she wasn't expecting it (to be honest, neither was I), but soon I felt her arms circle me and cradle me tightly to her.

"Scrambled eggs, coming up!" Juice's cheerful voice boomed through the kitchen. I knew he was trying to lighten the mood, in his own, typical way.

As we were seated by the breakfast bar, eating the delicious breakfast my wonderful boyfriend had made us, I couldn't help my curiosity.

"What are you doing here mom?" She put down her fork and looked at me.

"Well, I don't know about other people, but I think it's quite common for a concerned mother to want to know where her child is, and how it's faring, don't you?" A tiny part of my old mom shone through at that moment, and I could swear I saw a half smile grace her face.

"Right…" I was still not convinced. "So how long are you staying?" I decided to stick to safe topics.

"Oh, I don't know, perhaps a week or so?" the last part sounded as if she was asking permission to stay.

"Awesome, then I can show you campus and stuff", I tried to sound positive and I think I pulled it off. I ignored the strange look I got from Juice and dug into my breakfast.

_Juice POV_

As we finished up breakfast I volunteered to do the dishes, knowing that the women would want to catch up. Damn, this had been one hell of a morning. I hadn't really expected it to go like this. In my mind the morning after Ashley and I made love for the first time, we'd sleep in, have a late breakfast, and then spend the rest of the day in bed. And no, you pervert, I don't mean having sex, there's a lot you can do in a bed, that is, in fact, not sexual at all. I'd be completely happy talking, watching movies and just being with Ashley for an entire day. I never got tired of watching her. Every movement was graceful, even in the morning, with bed hair and sleepy eyes, everything about her seem so beautiful. Okay, I knew I was being a fucking sap, but there was really no other way to describe it.

Just as I finished the dishes I heard the girls making their way to the front door. After some murmurs and a quick shout of goodbye to me, the door shut with a slam and Ashley entered the kitchen. Her beautiful, smooth legs seemed endless under the short t-shirt she wore. I couldn't keep my eyes from her.

"So… that was surprising", she sighed.

"Good or bad?" I asked as I made my way over to her and encircled her in my arms.

"I don't know… both I guess", she shrugged into my embrace and rested her cheek on my chest. Her arms wound around me and her hands started caressing my back. I was getting painfully aware of my half-naked state.

"Did you make any plans?" I enquired, in an attempt to steer my mind onto neutral ground.

"Yup, I'm meeting her tomorrow afternoon after school".

"Okay…" my focus was kind of wavering as her fingers caressed my sides.

"You do know, you could have put a shirt on?" She said with humor.

"Why?" I shrugged.

"Because the tattoos kind of freaked out my mother", she smiled. "You do look kind of intimidating with those", she smoothed her fingers over the reaper on my back.

"Oh yeah?" I raised an eyebrow. "Do they intimidate you?" She smiled at this.

"Nope".

"No?" I felt her hands move to the front of my torso and slide up to my chest.

"No, they only make me extremely horny", she said it with such ease as if it was the most natural thing in the world. And Juicy Jr. rose to the occasion.

I didn't waste time answering her. Instead I swept her up and carried her to the bedroom and had my way with her. And yes, we stayed in bed most of the day.

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><p><strong>AN: Thank you for reading! Hope you enjoyed it! Please feel free to review and stuff, that would be awesome!<strong>

**Love,**

**Nat**


	14. Chapter 14  A Flying Fart In Space

**AN: Hey everybody! I'm finally done with this chapter. It took a while to find the inspiration, but I think it turned out ok. :)**

**I would like to thank you all for reading this little thing and I hope you are enjoying it as much as I am:P (Although, it's quite the challenge to be honest)**

**Okey, I'll let you read now, feel free to review!**

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><p><strong>Chapter XIV – A Flying Fart In Space<strong>

_Juice POV_

Having Ashley's mother here wasn't as bad as I'd thought it would be. Sure, we didn't have that much alone time together, but I could see that Ashley was reconnecting with her mother, and seeing my girl happy made me happy too. Wait, scratch that, I got fucking ecstatic seeing her smile so much.

Ashley was the main thing occupying my brain these days. I even found it hard to concentrate on the things I had to do for work. Which was a bit of a fucking problem, since Zobelle and his boys were getting way too fucking rowdy for the Son's liking. The thing was, nothing Zobelle did made any sense. He was supposed to belong to the LOAN, and he made deals with the Nordics, while at the same time seeming to make friends with the Mayans. He was a fucking enigma, that's what he was.

I never told Ashley about club business. Mostly because I didn't think she'd understand why we did half of the things we did, but also because I was afraid that it would in some way contaminate her. I was afraid that if I told her about my real job, I'd pollute her with the filthiness. With _my _filthiness. And I couldn't stand the thought of that.

"Oi! Juicey boy! Wake up!" Chibs's gruff voice startled me out of my trancelike state. I blinked a few times and noticed my surroundings. The air in the clubhouse was ever so stuffy and the afternoon sun was peeking in from between the blinds and casting golden trails along the keyboard of my laptop.

"What?" I mumbled looking questionably at Chibs. He looked too fucking chipper for my liking.

"The boss has assigned us a mission!" He smiled his crooked smile that made the scars on his cheeks look like dimples. Almost, but not really.

"Yeah? What kind of mission?" I certainly hoped it didn't include any trucks filled with feces…

"He wanted us to shadow that Weston bloke, starting bright and early tomorrow mornin'", his smile was slightly mocking.

"Great", I mumbled as I shut my laptop. "Does that mean I get to go home now?" Chibs smiled crookedly again.

"Yeah, you go home and make that sweet luvin' to yer bird", he sing-sang (well he came as close as a chain smoking Irishman could come) and turned on the heel of his boot and headed for the garage. And so I packed up my stuff and headed home, only wishing that my Irish friend had been right.

As I got off my bike outside of Ashley's apartment I saw that her lights were on. I made my way up the stairs quickly, taking them three at a time, and found myself outside her door. It was slightly ajar. I felt a small shiver along my spine as I pushed it open. I was greeted by the smell of food cooking and her record player playing some oldies song.

I relaxed when I heard her singing along with the lyrics in the kitchen. I stood, leaning against a wall and watched her move about the kitchen while slowly swaying to the music and singing the lyrics.

_Without your love_

_It's a honky-tonk parade_

_Without your love_

_It's a melody played in a penny arcade_

_Say it's only a paper moon_

_Sailing over a cardboard sea_

_But it wouldn't be make believe_

_If you believed in me_

Her clear voice rose and sank perfectly in tune to the record. I felt my muscles relax as I allowed myself to get lulled by the tone in her voice. This was it. This was fucking _it_. This was home. I know I've said this before, but I'll never get sick of repeating it. This girl was my home. She was my fucking anchor. She was the safe harbor I never knew I needed in the never ending shit storm that was my life. She made everything worthwhile and I knew I could never be without her. It was crazy and I knew it. But I couldn't help myself.

I hadn't realized I'd closed my eyes until I felt her hands caressing the arms I'd crossed over my chest. I gazed at her as I opened my arms, and tried to convey all my feelings for her in that one look. I think she understood, because as I looked into her eyes I felt the same emotion radiating from within her stare. I enfolded her in my arms and felt the peace settle in my body as she sank into me. We stood like that for a while before I realized none of us had said a word.

"What's cooking, babe?" I asked, my nose buried in her hair.

"Just some chicken and pasta", she smiled up at me. "Sound good?"

"Sounds amazing", I brushed a tendril of hair behind her ear. "Where's your mom?"

"She decided to take a trip to Morada. She has a friend up there", she shrugged.

"And when will she be back?" I looked up at the clock which showed the time to be about nine. It was getting pretty late to be out and about.

"Oh, that's the best part", Ashley smiled devilishly. "She's gonna stay with her friend for the night".

I had to smile at this. Chibs had to be fucking psychic. "Really?"

"Yup", she popped the 'P'. "So, I think I'll just have an early night…"

"Oh no, you won't", I interrupted her.

"No? Why is that?" Her smile told me she knew all too well why. I decided to be completely frank with her.

"Because I plan to ravish you all night to make up for the last week", I was pleased to see her mouth open slightly and her breathing hitch.

The dinner was fucking delicious, as usual and as I did the dishes Ashley went to call and check on her mother.

_Ashley POV_

This week had been wonderful. And absolutely horrible. It had been wonderful considering I had gotten to spend time with my mother. We were now connecting in a way we never had before. Before, I'd always seen my dad as the parent with whom I could talk about anything, and when he left, I'd blamed my mother for ruining such a perfect thing. But now everything was different. _I _was different. Without knowing it, I'd grown up a lot since moving away from home. My mom was the one to point it out. She'd told me that she saw the change in me immediately, that I was no longer the little girl she was used to. And perhaps this was a good thing. Perhaps I had needed to get away and grow up in order to see my mother in another way, to understand her. I really felt as if we'd gotten closer this past week than we had been during my entire childhood.

The horrible part about this week was that having my mother here meant that sexy time with Juice was limited. And by limited I mean nonexistent. Which was too bad, seeing as we'd only just begun exploring that part of our relationship when my mother showed up on my doorstep.

Juice had really been a good sport about having her here. I think he knew what this meant to me and I received nothing but support from him. He would never show it, but I knew it was all wearing on him a bit.

I think my mom realized we needed some alone time too, which may or may not be the reason she decided to call up some old college friend who lived near Charming. It might sound odd that my mother would do such a thing to get her daughter laid, but that was kind of how our relationship worked nowadays. While my father had been like most fathers – caring and thoughtful, but always a bit overbearing when it came to some things, the relationship my mom and I had established, was more that of two friends. And I think I preferred to have this kind of relationship, as it made it easier to talk to her about things without feeling too much like a child.

So, taking the presented opportunity I decided to cook my boyfriend dinner and give him some hard-earned… _sexy time_.

As I hung up the phone after checking on my mom, I quickly ran into the bedroom and opened the bottom drawer of my dresser and pulled out something silkier and lacier than I had ever worn before. I'd bought the set while out and about with my mother and I had been told that it would accentuate my body type (whatever that meant). In the store I'd felt really sexy and comfortable, but suddenly here, when I was about to show it to the only person in the world who's opinion really mattered in this situation; I was starting to feel self-conscious. I slipped it on quickly, so that I didn't have time to change my mind.

The set wasn't all that special. It consisted of a bra and panties in sheer purple lace. The bra pushed my boobs together, creating a massive cleavage (I wasn't complaining) and the panties framed my behind in a lovely way. What made the whole ensemble more… _interesting_ was the silky purple stay ups. They were also quite sheer and topped with black lace. I slid them on carefully and pulled on a pair of heels to complete the ensemble. I took a deep breath and, hoping I didn't look like a complete idiot made my way back to the kitchen.

I stood in the doorway and looked at him. His broad shoulders moved as he put away the last of the dishes. The black lettering of his back piece was peeking out on either side of his wife beater. His shaved head was angled slightly downwards and when he raised it I got a good look at his lightning bolts. As he started to turn around I leaned against the doorway and put one hand on my hip, bracing myself for his reaction.

"Ashl-"

He didn't get further than that before he spotted me. His eyes went as big as saucers and his jaw dropped. He didn't say anything but I knew that he approved. Still, there was no reason why I couldn't have a little fun with it.

"You don't like it?" I asked, trying to look hurt and pouted my lower lip a bit more than natural. Who ever said I was a good actress?

"I ah… eh… I…" He was trying to formulate a sentence but it didn't seem to be working for him.

"Oh", I said, feigning defeat and turned. "I guess I'll go change-" As soon as I'd turned he rushed up to me and forcefully crushed me to him.

"You're not going anywhere", he growled in my ear. "Not without me." Yes he actually freaking _growled_.

His hands dug into my flesh with such force I was beginning to understand just _how _frustrating the past week had been for him. And to be completely honest, it hadn't been all that easy for me either.

My back was pressed against his front and his arms were crossed over my body. I could feel his ragged breaths across my neck as he pressed himself into me. We both moaned slightly as he pressed his… _manhood_ (for lack of a better word) into my behind. He kind of had to lift me up slightly in order to achieve the kind of friction we both needed (as previously stated (many times) I'm not especially tall). His breathy whisper was almost hard to detect.

"I need you baby", his fingers dug into my sides and glided down toward the edge of my panties. "I don't think I've ever needed anything so bad in my entire life", to emphasize his point he pressed into me once again and I could totally see his point. I turned my head (which was as much as I could turn in his vice-like grip) and smiled up at him.

"Then why are we still here?" That was all it took. Suddenly we weren't in the kitchen anymore, but flying down the hallway to my bedroom.

This time it wasn't sweet, it wasn't tender. We tore at each other's clothes and to be honest I didn't give a flying fart in space if we ripped anything. My expensive set went flying all the way across the room and I don't even know where Juice's clothes went.

It was frenzied, furious and absolutely glorious. I'd never felt so… _wanted_ in my entire life. Wanted in a sexual way, that is. As we came together again and again, our bodies intertwining, curving and moving in unison, I felt so many emotions coursing through me, I felt dizzy. All the lust and love was making me feel as if I was about to combust. When it was over I felt as if I was soaring five feet above the bed. But Juice was there to keep me grounded. As I laid on top of him, my head resting on top of my crossed arms, I felt his chest rumble underneath my arms. I looked up to meet his eyes.

"What?"

"It's just funny", he sighed, meeting my eyes.

"What's funny?" I started tracing invisible patterns on his skin with my fingertips.

"You. Me. Everything", he laughed. "I just never thought I could be this lucky", he touched my cheek ever so lightly. I felt my eyes starting to prickle with (thus far) unshed tears.

"I know what you mean", I whispered as I leaned in to gently press my lips against his. "It's almost too good to be true".

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><p><strong>AN: Famous last words? Well see...<strong>

**Thank you for reading and feel free to leave me a review!**

**Love,**

**Nat**


	15. Chapter 15 Daddy

**AN: Hi! Sorry for sucking again, but here comes a chapter (albeit a short one)! ;)**

**If I'm right there is about one or two chappies left of this baby and I'm also toying with the idea of an epilogue.**

**In any case, thank you for sticking with me and please enjoy!**

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><p><strong>Chapter XV - Daddy<strong>

_Juice POV_

I slowly came back to reality. I knew I was in a soft bed that wasn't mine. I knew that the pillow under my head smelled of detergent that wasn't mine. When I shifted my face downward my nose dove into something silky and smelling of roses. _This _was definitely mine. I pressed myself closer to her back and drew a deep breath, filling my nostrils with her scent, as if I would somehow be able to inhale some of her inside of me, to keep forever. The sheets had slipped off our bodies in sleep and I disentangled an arm to pull them back up. As soon as my arm left its place around her torso I heard a small whimper. Thinking she was awake I looked down at her face. It was still relaxed in sleep and I could do nothing other than revel in the beauty of her features. I loved that she looked like no one I'd ever met. She looked so pure and sweet, especially in sleep. I stroked the smooth expanse of her cheek with a finger. The corner of her mouth turned up in a half smile. I continued my ministrations until she started to stir.

"Good morning babe", I murmured into her ear. She opened one eye and gazed at me.

"Mornin' stud", she said sleepily. I couldn't help but laugh at her. "Breakfast?" she opened her other eye and raised an eyebrow.

"I can think of something I hunger for", I whispered huskily and removed the sheets again to uncover the soft beautiful creature beneath them. I lunged at her chest with fervor. After a few minutes of nuzzling she playfully swatted at my shoulders.

"Well, _I _actually need real sustenance!" and as soon as the words were out of her mouth she was out of my arms and half-way to the kitchen. I sighed and leaned back into the pillows reveling in the warmth on the sheets that was still left from her body heat. Life was fucking good.

_Ashley POV_

As I entered the kitchen I sighed blissfully. I knew I'd fallen. He was everything I never knew I wanted. I'd never felt as safe as I felt in his arms. However this dependency was also somewhat alarming, because I had never been this tied to anyone before. The way my every thought was infected by him, by my feelings toward him was a kind of scary ecstasy, ambiguous to say the least.

Two seconds later my mother was in the kitchen. I briefly wondered where she had gotten a key but decided it didn't really matter.

"Hello darling!" she looked well-rested and actually quite joyful. "Did you two have a nice evening?"

"Yes, I would say it was pretty… satisfactory", Juice suddenly appeared in the kitchen. Thankfully he'd had the decency to put on both his pants and his shirt.

"Okaay, that's more than I need to know!" My mother made a face and quickly changed the topic as I began to produce breakfast related items from the refrigerator. "I had an absolutely wonderful time with Liz! I got to hear all the gossip and we stayed up talking about everything that had happened since we last saw each other." A quick look of sadness suddenly crossed her features but was gone before I could say anything. "Anyway, I was thinking we should do some shopping, I'm leaving in a couple of days and I want to spend some one on one time with my only daughter", she looked pointedly at me.

"Right, sure, I could use some new stuff", I shrugged and glanced at Juice.

"Yep, I need to get some work done down at the shop", he stated as he put some bread in the toaster. "I'll see you guys for dinner? We could go to the diner down by 12th?"

"Sounds wonderful!" my mom exclaimed and with that our plans for the day were set and we all sat down to eat.

_Juice POV_

I was in a blissful dream state as I entered the club house. No one said anything; Bobby merely snickered and shook his head. I barely registered anything that was said during Church, Opie had to remind me of what I was supposed to do afterwards. I knew I was being a fucking sap, but damn if I didn't enjoy it. I loved how my every thought was filled with her; everything was suddenly related to her. Some rational part of my brain was still firing warning signals, telling me that these feelings were way too intense and that I needed to slow down and take a step back. But the thing was I didn't want to. Because taking a step back from Ashley, from my feelings for her, meant taking a step back from this new person I was becoming because of her. And that just wouldn't fucking do.

So I casually ignored the sirens in my head and kept on daydreaming of her. If I believed in that kind of shit, I'd even go as far as to say that she was the love of my life, my shitty crap life. If I didn't keep myself in check, I'd be fantasizing of marriage and children before I knew it. Shit, kids. I'd never even thought I'd have any. I just never saw myself as a dad. But I knew that Ashley would make an awesome mom, I just knew it. And for her, I'd make a fucking effort to be an okay dad. Which probably meant I had to cut down on the swearing.

As I did the internet searches and piled together the information Jax needed, I kept on daydreaming of little girls with Ashley's hair in little pigtails and boys in little Samcro t-shirts and mohawks running around the club house.

_Ashley POV_

The next day was spent doing some homework while babysitting Abel at Jax's. It had been a while since my services had been needed and I couldn't believe how much he had grown. With babies of his age, there was change to see each day. I'd never thought of myself as a mother, but I found myself thinking about kids more and more. In particular Juice's kids. I don't really know why, but somehow I felt that the world needed more people like him.

When I left Jax's at four in the afternoon I called my mom and asked her to meet up at the local cafe. I was dying for a chai latte and some one on one girl time. I knew she was leaving tomorrow and I wanted to spend as much time as possible with her, enjoying this new friendship that had blossomed between us.

As we were headed into the café, we heard the familiar roar of Harleys and turned to see a posse of SOA bikers approaching and halting in front of a cigar shop. It suddenly hit me that I hadn't told my mom what Juice was involved in. I didn't have time to comment before they removed their helmets and I recognized Jax, Clay, Bobby and Juice. They made their way toward a suit clad gentleman with grey hair, who was accompanied by two men with shaved heads, one of whom had a swastika tattooed right on his chest. The other had some other form of symbol, something with red coloring. He looked grimmer than the other. They exchanged words and the conversation didn't seem like one between friends. I'd never seen Juice frown so hard, I was used to the carefree, loving guy I'd come to know. This man looked as if he'd seen horrible things in his life and wasn't averse to inflicting something horrible on someone else. But my focus quickly changed when I glanced toward my mother. Her jaw had dropped and she stared intently at the group of men.

"What is it? Mom?" I was starting to get worried when she didn't answer me. "Mom? Hello?" When I shook her shoulder she seemed startled and then her eyes slowly focused on my. The look in her eyes scared me. "What is it mom?"

She swallowed slowly and met my eyes. "That Ashley… that is you father". She was pointing at the group of men across the street.

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><p><strong>AN: Dun-Dun-DUNN!<strong>

**Thank you for reading and if you'd like it would be awesome if you reviewed. Thanks!**

**Love, Nat**

**:***


	16. Chapter 16 The Last Chapter

**AN: Soo... This has been a long time coming, and I'm truly sorry for that. It just took a while for me to get to writing this. And I apologize in advance if the chapter seems incoherent or kind of choppy, but I just really wanted to post it as soon as possible:)**

**So, this is the last chapter of this story and I hope you've enjoyed the ride;) I have an epilogue planned, and it will be up in a few days.**

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><p>Chapter XVI – The Last Chapter<p>

_Daddy POV_

As I scanned the street I saw something that made me question my sanity. There, on the curb stood Meredith. She had once been the love of my life, and to be honest, I couldn't say that anyone had taken that place after her. A long time ago she had made me feel something. Something that felt way too close to love to have me comfortable. I supposed it was love, but I couldn't be sure, as I'd never experienced anything like it, not before her, nor after.

I had to blink a couple of times in order to make sure I wasn't going crazy. When I focused my gaze again, she was still there. She smiled sadly at me. She hadn't changed at all. Her hair was still the same, albeit a bit more faded. Her eyes still seemed to hold the world in them.

She looked down and then at the younger girl beside her. She told her something and the girl looked up at us. In that moment I felt my heart drop. I knew it, on instinct. This was Meredith's daughter. She was a copy of her mother. Even down to the hair.

I felt… _angry_. I knew the reaction was stupid, and so not called for, but I couldn't help myself. I was angry that she ran away and made a family for herself, all the while leaving me alone, a bitter old man. I was angry that she had found somebody else to father her children.

As Meredith and her daughter quickly hastened away, I decided what I needed to do. I needed to see her, and I needed to set things right.

_Ashley POV_

As my mom finished her rendition of how she had met my father (the biological one), she proceeded to fiddle with the sleeves of her shirt while waiting for my reply. Frankly speaking, I didn't know what to say. I was actually speechless. The café had never felt so quiet.

You know the feeling you get when something enormous happens to you? Something that might potentially change your life? To me, it feels as if you are outside your own body, your own life, looking in and seeing this happen to someone else. It feels as if your life is a movie and you are merely the spectator.

Which was why I sat there, completely stumped as the realization hit me. Shit. There were so many things that went through my mind that I didn't know where to start. So I just randomly grabbed a thought and hung on to it.

"Sorry mom but… You and a biker? I just can't picture it!" I had to laugh. It was either that or cry, and somehow, laughing felt better. My mom's face seemed to gain a little hope.

"Yeah yeah, look who's talking", she teased. "I'll have you know he was quite the looker twenty years ago!"

Our playful banter was cut short when the bell above the door jingled and the man that apparently was my father entered. His eyebrows were drawn together and his mouth was set in a taught line. He headed straight for our table. My mother stared at him. He stared back at her. This felt way to intimate for me to witness. It felt like I needed to give them a minute, but at the same time I wanted to stay, to defend my mother if need be. The man was scowling so hard down at her that I felt a need to position myself between them.

"If you're staying, pull up a chair, and if not, just leave", I said, my voice as stern as I could make it. I could sense that my mother wasn't entirely comfortable with the situation. The man's head whipped around and he stared just as angrily at me. I met his eyes and tried to convey as much determination as I could muster. He seemed surprised and his eyebrows lifted lightly. He muttered something as he grabbed a chair from a nearby table and sat down between us.

"So…" my mother began. "How have you been?" He stared at her for a beat.

"Really? That's what you have to say after twenty years of silence?" He seemed almost sad for a moment.

"It's a good place to start isn't it?" my mother said calmly, trying not to irritate the man further.

"Yeah well, I've been shit. You?" He snared.

"I've had good days and bad", she said diplomatically. "Oh, you haven't met my daughter, Ashley. Ashley, this is…"

"Ernest, Ernest Darby", he said and gruffly shook my hand. He then quickly returned his gaze to my mother. She continued to tell him about me.

"She actually moved here recently. She's studying at CU, literature. Scholarship, she's very talented…" she was interrupted by Darby's stern voice.

"I don't fucking care about your kid's intelligence! All I wanna know is why you're here!"

I couldn't take it. I was angry. I was sad. My own father didn't care about anything other than the simple fact that my mother was here. He didn't want anything to do with me, and he sure as hell didn't want me. I felt a prickling of tears in my eyes, and it wasn't long before the first one trailed down my cheek. My mother seemed to be taken over by a demon.

"You do not talk to my daughter that way! If you are even half the man you were twenty years ago, you would understand what it is I'm telling you. Don't you recognize anything in her? Don't you see that her eyes are the exact same color as yours? Don't you see that she has your stubbornness? Are you really so stupid that you can't even recognize your own daughter?" Even I got scared. And I could see my father growing wide-eyed and he slowly turned his head toward me. I was really on a roll now and my tears were flowing freely. He slowly opened his mouth as if to say something. But nothing came out. He closed it just as slowly. He kept staring at me, as if sizing me up, doing the math in his head. As realization dawned on him his features seemed to microscopically soften. The thick rift between his eyebrows seemed shallower as well as the lines around his mouth.

At that moment I knew things were going to be different. I still couldn't think of him as _dad_, but at least I was on the road to getting there. I didn't know him yet, but I suddenly found myself opening up to the suggestion. I looked up at him and he met my stare and held it, his face open, honest. As he turned to my mother I knew that was my cue. I started to rise from the chair.

"Well, I think I should let you two catch up", I smiled at the pair of them. I turned to my mother, "see you back at the apartment?" She nodded and smiled timidly up at me. I returned her smile, in order to reassure her. Everything was fine between us. At least close to fine, and that would have to do for now.

I gathered my bag and jacket and turned to leave. Just as I took my first step I felt a hand clamp down on my wrist. Confused, I first looked down at my arm. A strong tattooed arm was gripping my wrist and my eyes travelled up the arm, finally meeting a steely gray gaze. His eyes seemed to be pleading. Two words left his lips as throaty yet soft as a whisper. But the meaning behind them weighed heavily.

"I'm sorry".

I squeezed his forearm and smiled slightly, I wanted him to know that we still had a chance.

As I stepped out of the cafe I heard my phone ring. I stood for a few seconds rummaging through my bag before I finally found the source of the ringing. The screen said Scary Awesome Boss Lady, a nickname I'd come up with together with Juice.

"Hello?" I answered anyway.

"Hi Ash, it's Gemma. Are you very busy?" I knew where this was going.

"No, not terribly, do you need my help?"

"Yeas, it would be god sent if you could come by! I have to leave in an hour to sign for some stuff over at the shop. You wouldn't be opposed to helping out with Able for a couple of hours?"

"No problem, I'll be over in fifteen, sound good?" I smiled to myself, I'd missed the little rascal.

"Ah, you're the best! See you soon!"

And with that I headed for my car and made my way over to Jax's.

_Juice POV_

We had been following Zobelle around for the better part of the day, but the fucker was smart. We'd never gotten the opportunity to off the animal.

I saw Jax answer his phone and a few seconds later he announced that he was going over to his house. It had been Tara on the phone and everything was _not _okay.

Ashley had texted me earlier, telling me she was heading over to Jax's to sit for Abel. If there was something up at the house, she would be there as well. I jumped my bike and joined Jax.

When we arrived at the house we heard screams from inside. We grabbed our guns and went into the house. It was a mess, there were things everywhere. We heard the back door slam open, and went into the kitchen. What we saw there made my heart stop. And I don't fucking mean metaphorically, it literally stopped for a few seconds. I felt all the blood leave my face and my nerves seemed to explode. There, in a pool of blood, her own blood, was Ashley. She seemed to have a deep gash in her abdomen and her tiny white hands were clutching at her tummy desperately, trying to stop the blood from flowing, but she was weak and the blood flowed freely between her fingers. I rushed up to her, dropping to my knees and hugging her to me.

"Ashley, Ashley! What happened?" I cried.

"The man..." she whispered. "He… took Abel… find him… he has Abel", her eyelids fluttered closed.

I looked up to meet Jax's stare. I could see the terror in his eyes, and for once I could actually understand it. He loved his son just as much as I loved Ashley. Felt her body turning lax in my arms, her tiny shape seemed completely lifeless. My heart was ripped into a hundred pieces, drenched in alcohol and set on fire. A hundred times over.

"Baby, I love you so much, so you can't fucking leave me. I won't fucking survive it." My voice seemed coarse and didn't sound like my own.

I carefully laid her down on the blood smeared kitchen floor and stood up. Jax had gone through the house and found Tara, bound up in the nursery. She told us that it had been Cameron, avenging his girlfriend. I met Jax gaze and a kind of silent communication seemed to flow between us. And it was decided.

"Let's go find the fucker", I ground out. With a last look at Ashley I stormed out of the house and straddled my bike.

We rode around Charming, looking for Cameron's car, but no one seemed to have seen it. Finally we found it abandoned by the side of the road, near a gas station. I sighed as we headed back to our bikes.

"There's something we're missing", I sighed as I strapped my helmet onto my head.

"Yeah, but _what_?" Jax said, exasperated.

"Let's look at it from his perspective, where would you go, if you had just stabbed an innocent woman and kidnapped a baby?"

"Out of the country?" Jax offered.

"And how would you do it undetected?" I continued.

"Uhm…" He seemed confused.

"Fake identification!" I said. "And I know exactly to whom he'd go!"

I knew almost everyone who dealt with passports and IDs in Charming, and something told me Cameron would only settle for the best. I revved my bike and told Jax to follow me. We were going to get back Abel and then I was going to kill the son of a bitch that had killed the love of my life.

Sure as shit, the first guy we saw coming out of the shabby underground storage facility where the dealer used, was no one other than Cameron. He was carrying a bundle of fabric that had to be Abel. He made his way to a shiny blue Volvo. He first opened the passenger door and put the bundle on the passenger seat. As he closed the door and moved over to the driver's seat. But before he could even reach the handle, I had him pinned against the car. Jax moved swiftly and retrieved Abel from the front seat, clutching him to his chest. But to be honest I was more focused on the fucker before me. He was not going to receive any mercy.

I started pummeling him and soon his entire chin was covered in the blood he was coughing up and I started in on his face, busting his eye to start with. As the blood flowed down his face I had a brief flashback to Jax's kitchen and Ashley. The momentary lapse in presence was my undoing. Cameron managed to pull my gun out of my holster.

I heard the shot before I felt any pain. Then, suddenly I felt a sharp sting in the right side of my chest. I knew the bullet had gone through my ribs. I felt my legs giving out and soon I could taste gravel and sand in my mouth. The pain was actually dulling, but so were all my other senses. As if in a distance I heard the sound of Harleys and soon I could make out the shapes of my brothers as they all jumped Cameron. If I could have, I would have smiled. It was done, Ashley was avenged and I was soon to leave this world. I mumbled a short prayer my mother had taught me when I was a kid. It was sad, yet, in a way, everything seemed right, as it should be. This was the end of the last chapter of my life. And what a chapter it had been. And all because of her. The last thing I saw before everything went dark was her face.

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><p><strong>AN: Thank you SO much for reading my little work of fiction, and I have to say LOVE you guys for doing so! 3<strong>

**Please feel free to review! :)**

**Love,**

**Nat**


	17. Epilogue

**AN: And so, this is the last part of this little fic:) Love you guys for reading!**

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><p>Epilogue<p>

_Juice POV_

As I felt my body slowly coming to life, so did my dreams. In a streaming rush, all the visions of Her came back to me and I felt my heart break all over again. No, it didn't just fucking break, it felt like it was being ripped to shreds by unsharpened claws. Over and over again, until there was nothing left, except for an echoing emptiness. It hurt, it actually physically hurt to think about not being able to pull her against me, smell her hair, and listen to her melodious laugh. The only thing that made this fucked up situation remotely better was the fact that we'd gotten the bastard who stabbed her. I was sure I'd have finished him off with my bare hands if he hadn't shot me.

I finally managed to pull my lids apart to take in my surroundings. At first the light blinded me but I was soon able to make out the shape of the room. It was your average, typical hospital room, complete with white walls and framed posters of landscapes. Right now the only thing I could think about when I saw the poster of the Alps or some shit, like taken straight out of fucking Sound of Music, was that the grey, silvery shade of the mountains was nowhere near as beautiful as the color of her eyes. As my gaze kept scanning the room it landed on a lonely figure slumped against the wall. The figure didn't seem to belong here. The broad shoulders were covered by black, worn leather and his jaw was covered with a sprinkling of blonde stubble. His eyes were closed as if he was asleep.

It was as if he somehow felt my eyes on him. He suddenly opened his eyes and looked directly at me. For a long moment not a word was said. Finally Jax moved up from his seat and made his way over to the hospital bed. This close I could see that he had tears in his eyes. We didn't need words. I knew what he wanted to say. But he said it anyway.

"Thank you Juice", his voice was raspy. He reminded me a lot of Clay.

"You know I didn't do it for you, right? I did it for her", I swallowed back the hurt that I inevitably felt whenever I thought of her.

"I know. But it doesn't matter. Thank you for giving me my son back".

He gripped my forearm tightly and that was how Gemma found us when she entered the room a couple of minutes later.

"How are you holding up, champ?" she whispered.

"Shit. Not holding up at all", I muttered. Thinking I should just get it over with I asked:

"How long was I out?"

"Just a few days", Jax answered.

"So, when's the funeral?" I felt my throat constrict as I imagined her in a casket, cold and alone. Fuck! Why couldn't I have gone too? That way we would've been buried together and she wouldn't be alone wherever she was now. Shit, I'd probably not even go to the same place as her. She was an angel and I was… well, not. I closed my eyes tightly and waited for their answer. It didn't come. I slowly opened my eyes and saw Gemma and Jax exchanging looks.

"What funeral?" Jax finally said.

"What do you mean _what funeral_?" I asked, irritated. "The funeral of my girlfriend, my would-be future wife! The woman who would've borne my children! The one I was stupid enough to lose!" I slumped back toward the fluffy pillow behind my back, suddenly exhausted. The room was dead silent. Both Jax and Gemma stared wide-eyed at me as if I'd suddenly gone crazy. Maybe I had. But I didn't care. The love of my life had been ripped from me and I was allowed to go fucking crazy.

Gemma opened her mouth as if to say something but was interrupted by a loud crash and screams outside the door. At first I coouldn't make out what was being said, but as the sound came closer, I heard fragments.

"Get the fuck out of my way! …get to him! …mine… I don't care"

The moment before the door swung open I recognized the voice. There, in the doorway, lit up by the hospital's florescent lights like an angel was her. Her hair wild and unruly and she was fashionably dressed in a hospital gown. Her feet were bare and as she stalked toward me I could see her hand going to her stomach. But as she landed in my arms I couldn't find it in myself to care about anything other than the fact that she was alive. She was still here and I was not planning on letting her go anywhere again.

"Ashley", I sighed as I buried my nose in her hair. For the first time since I had woken up I allowed myself to think and say her name. She raised her head and looked into my eyes.

"Hi", her smile was slight and as I placed my hands on either side of her face she leaned into them and closed her eyes. I spoke softly and slowly. My tears flowed down my face. I was not a guy who cried very often, but right now I didn't fucking care.

"Ashley…" I took a deep breath. "I love you so fucking much. I… I thought you were dead and… and I can't even describe to you what went on in my head. I can't fucking imagine my life without you". She opened her eyes and I could see the emotions I felt, mirrored in her gaze. She smiled.

"And you told me you suck with words", she smiled secretively. And then she turned serious. "I love you too. So much it hurts. I don't think I can let you go", she admitted and I felt my heart soar. I decided to just go for it.

"Ashley. I know we're young and that there are so many things standing in our way, but I just need to ask you one thing. Ashley Armstrong, I love you twice around the world and back and I promise to always be there for you. Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

Fin.

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><p><strong>AN: And yes, I can't bear unhappy endings! So if you think this is cheesy, pretend as if this last chapter wasn't there;)<strong>

**And I suppose this is where I (once again) thank you all profusely for reading, reviewing and just taking the time to finds this:)**

**Someone else i'd like to thank is my mom. She is the one who has always kicked me in the ass when the updates have been too far apart (so you guys can thank her that I finally finished this) :P And she hasn't even read this! (Mostly because I wont let her *PERFORMANCE ANXIETY*)**

**In any case, I _might _write a one-shot sequel to this fic (like a glimpse into the future of Juice and Ashley), but it all depends on if you guys want one ;)**

**Okay, one last time, you guys are AWESOME for reading my fic and making me feel like something close to an author. You have no idea how excited I get when I see a new review, or a fav!**

**Infinite love and hugs,**

**Nat 3**


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